Hire Jim Essian

Joe Girardi has always been a weird-looking dude. But until the folks at Halos Heaven pointed it out, I didn't realize how much he looks like Skeletor. Apparently, he used whatever the opposite of power of Greyskull is (the power of Snake Mountain?) on his way home from winning the World Series to assist a woman who had ... Read More

Welcome to the merciful final weekend of the season. I can't honestly recommend watching us finish up the season against a bad Diamondbacks team, so instead I'll suggest that you pay attention to the only pennant race left. Kermit has made no secret of his unabashed love for the Minnesota Twins. I can hardly blame him. All of ... Read More

It's bad enough when the only people who are sucking the enjoyment out of the Cubs for me are other idiotic Cub fans, but now I can't help but get sucked in to the cesspool of unexamined mental unhealthiness that is Sox Nation? First there was Mark Buerhle's perfect game, which deserves acclaim, naturally. But then the Manolantern poses an ... Read More

Fair warning. If you like Todd Hundley or any of the Hundley clan, you probably shouldn't read the following story. Everyone still with me? Okay, good. I had to share this nugget sent in by a reader which- Well, I'll just let the story speak for itself. Yesterday i went to the cubs game with a ... Read More