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The Top 79 Cub Killers of My Time #8: “Everyone Doesn’t Like” Carlos Lee

Posted On 02 Feb 2012 By Bad Kermit. Under: Around the MLB, The Top 79.
The Top 79 Cub Killers of My Time #8: “Everyone Doesn’t Like” Carlos Lee Carlos Lee likes killing the Cubs like a fat kid like Carlos Lee likes cake. For all of you atheist Cub fans out there, I understand your godless ways. After all, what sort of higher power would allow Carlos Lee to play all but 59 of his 1,952 career games wearing the uniform of Cub "rivals"? Old Testament, maybe? Wherever your faith lies, know this. If you didn't utter "GOD DAMMIT" during at least one Carlos Lee's 541 at-bats against the Cubs, then you'll never understand why he pounded his way to #8 on the list of the Top 79 Cub Killers of My Time.

The Muskbox Turns to Podsednik, Horticulture, Plantnapping

Posted On 22 Dec 2009 By Bad Kermit. Under: Broadcasters & Journalists, Cubs, Muskbox.
The Muskbox Turns to Podsednik, Horticulture, Plantnapping Last week, we left the Muskbox on a romantic beach stroll with Ryan Theriot. This week, she's dining with Jim Edmonds, praising Scotty Pods, and MURDERING LIVING THINGS. What are the chances of the Cubs looking hard at re-signing Reed Johnson now that Mike Cameron is with the Red Sox? Reed was an absolute asset when healthy. How about finding ... Read More

Cubs Successfully Lower Bradley’s Value to Silva Level

Posted On 18 Dec 2009 By Bad Kermit. Under: Cubs, Transactions.
Cubs Successfully Lower Bradley’s Value to Silva Level Or: How I Learned to Stop Caring About the Cubs and Hate Jim Hendry. It's almost official. Jim Hendry is about to pull off the most monumentally stupid trade since he traded for Steve Trachsel. It appears that Milton Bradley is headed to the Seattle Mariners in exchange for the amazingly terrible Carlos Silva. (HT: Dolan) ... Read More

Sweet Uncle Lou’s Friday Roundup: The “Help! I’m Trapped in a Balloon!” Edition

Posted On 16 Oct 2009 By Sweet Uncle Lou. Under: Around the MLB, Lou's Friday Roundup.
Sweet Uncle Lou’s Friday Roundup: The “Help!  I’m Trapped in a Balloon!” Edition In the 90's, many of you probably spent hours staring at a white Bronco leading the lowest-speed chase in California history. In the 00's, the captivating chase was even slower. You probably spent some time yesterday watching an empty helium balloon floating through the Colorado sky. A balloon. You're a grown person. Even toddlers lose ... Read More

Congratulations, Jim. You’re Dumber Than Kenny

Posted On 01 Sep 2009 By Bad Kermit. Under: Cubs, Transactions.
Congratulations, Jim.  You’re Dumber Than Kenny Oh, Jim Hendry. For a guy with what appears to be the correct number of chromosomes, you sure don't understand baseball very well. Here we are on September 1st and, just as I suspected, you are still pretending that your mediocre team can make the postseason. In case you were wondering, Jim, Baseball Prospectus has you at ... Read More

Fixing the Cubs the Phil Rogers Way

Posted On 29 Jun 2009 By Bad Kermit. Under: Broadcasters & Journalists, Cubs.
Fixing the Cubs the Phil Rogers Way Quick. What's the dumbest thing you've ever thought? Was it something like, "Man, The Matrix is really deep," or "Green Day's music really speaks to me"? When you thought it, did you immediately feel shame and embarrassment for the idea even entering your mind? Or did you blurt out what you thought, perhaps in a room ... Read More
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