The Top 79 Cub Killers of My Time #50: Scott Downs “Syndrome”
If there’s one thing that’s absolutely infuriating about the Cubs, it’s their mystifying inability to hit left-handed pitching. No, scratch that. If there’s one thing that’s absolutely infuriating about the Cubs, it’s their 102-year championship drought. Number two is the other thing with the left-handers. A couple of offseasons ago, when Jim Hendry decided to [...]
The Top 79 Cub Killers of My Time #51: Jeff “Eff” Fassero
Ed. Note: When I’m long gone from this world and tales are told of what I did to make a difference in this life, no one will have an answer that doesn’t, at some point, use the phrase “dick joke.” Whether I leave a legacy in the expanding world of penis jokes or not, though, [...]
Sweet Uncle Lou’s “Friday” Roundup: The “Chicago Folk Heroes United” Edition
Well, well, well. The two greatest baseball players in Chicago history are finally united in San Francisco. The Giants’ signing of Mark DeRosa unites the stubbly heartthrob with Aaron Rowand, who made ladies swoon over the “run face-first into a wall” move before Reed Johnson thought of it. Thus, the 2010 Giants became an unstoppable [...]
The Top 79 Cub Killers of My Time #53: Jason Schmidt “Hits the Fan”
It’s been a while since Jason Schmidt was considered an elite MLB pitcher. It’s also been a while since the last time Schmidt pitched against the Chicago Cubs. Coincidence? Yes. But that doesn’t make Jason Schmidt any less deserving of being named the 53rd biggest Cub Killer of my time.
The Cubs Can’t Even Celebrate Correctly
I apologize for interrupting your regularly-scheduled Friday HJE, but this is just too stupid to ignore. Last night, Derrek Lee was on second base when Jeff Baker hit a two-strike, two-out home run off of closer Brian Wilson to give the Cubs a 3-2 lead over the Giants. During the dugout celebration, Angel Guzman slapped [...]
I Hate the NL West
Maybe I’m just annoyed with how the weekend series has gone so far. Maybe it’s because it seems like Todd Helton hits .800 against the Cubs. Maybe it’s because such piles of shit as Neifi Perez, Aaron Miles, Shawn Estes, and Dusty Baker have associations with NL West teams. Maybe it’s because of the outcome [...]
Sweet Uncle Lou’s Friday Roundup: The “Making up for Lost Time” Edition
Since there was no Roundup last week due to the fact that I was in a turkey coma, I have a lot of catching up to do. Plus, we have the Winter Meetings coming up next week in Las Vegas, so I have to help Hendry pick out a bunch of Hawaiian fat guy shirts. [...]
How to Break a 97-Win Team
The only time I read Bleed Cubbie Blue is when someone on Desipio links it. For someone on Desipio to link it, the writing must be worse than normal. So when I saw a link to the hilariously stupid “Building A Cubs Champion: Introducing Your 2009 Chicago Cubs” I had to click it. I now [...]
Instant Replay Is Fine, But Already Needs Fixing
I know your thoughts have already turned toward tomorrow night’s early evening’s late afternoon’s NLDS showdown between the Dodgers and the Cubs, but please permit me a brief rant about Bud Selig’s idiocy. I believe it was Sunday when I was listening to Pat and Ron on the radio, and Pat mentioned that on Saturday [...]
Muskbaggery
This week’s Muskbag is chock full of personal questions, propositions, and SAM FULD. Hurray!
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