When I did a GIS for Prince Fielder, the top related search was "prince fielder fat." Indeed he is, oh prescient Google. Prince Fielder is so fat, he has to wake up in sections. He's so fat, Rickie Weeks jogs around him for exercise. He's so fat, if he leaves Milwaukee via free agency, Wisconsin will ... Read More
The Top 79 Cub Killers of My Time #41: “Do You Have” Prince Fielder “In a Can?”
Posted On 12 Jul 2011 By Bad Kermit. Under: The Top 79.
When I did a GIS for Prince Fielder, the top related search was "prince fielder fat." Indeed he is, oh prescient Google. Prince Fielder is so fat, he has to wake up in sections. He's so fat, Rickie Weeks jogs around him for exercise. He's so fat, if he leaves Milwaukee via free agency, Wisconsin will ... Read More
The Top 79 Cub Killers of My Time #48: Chris “Phi Beta” Capuano
Posted On 03 Nov 2010 By Bad Kermit. Under: The Top 79.
For much of the mid-2000s, the Milwaukee Brewers' rotation consisted of Ben Sheets and four indistinguishable jackasses who couldn't throw fastballs hard enough to break water and had an aggressive affinity at alliteration. I'm not one for ridiculous conspiracies, but there is absolutely no reason to believe that Dave Bush, Doug Davis, Gary Glover, and Chris Capuano are not ... Read More
Magic Number Countdown: 11
Posted On 29 Sep 2008 By Bad Kermit. Under: Cubs, Postseason.
11 more wins. That's all the Cubs need to collect to make the unthinkable thinkable and to set off what will be the most ridiculous party in the history of the city of Chicago. You know HJE has a plan to count this down in style. Below are my top eleven moments of the 2008 season (in ... Read More
Hang in There, Brewers; Dusty May be Available Soon
Posted On 15 Sep 2008 By Bad Kermit. Under: NL Central.
2008 Cubs MVP Ned Yost was fired. Somewhere (probably in an Old Country Buffet), CC Sabathia is dancing jiggling with glee.
Thanks to JOn for the link. ... Read More
Sweet Uncle Lou’s Friday Roundup: The “We’re Good, and That’s the Tooth” Edition
Posted On 22 Aug 2008 By Sweet Uncle Lou. Under: Lou's Friday Roundup.
So, Carlos Zambrano went out and beat the Reds even after chewing his gum so hard that he cracked a molar? I'm not sure if that's badass or completely ridiculous. Either way, the magic number is at 30 with 35 games left to play. So, even if the Brewers win out, all we have to do is ... Read More
Ned Yost Should Be Indicted
Posted On 21 Aug 2008 By Bad Kermit. Under: NL Central.
With Dusty Baker in town with his old familiar dumbassery and excuse-making in tow, it's easy to think he is the stupidest manager in the National League Central, and he very well may be. But Ned Yost is sure making it interesting, isn't he? Yost's handling of CC Sabathia in Sabathia's nine starts since he came over to ... Read More
Here? In Chicago? Why, I Didn’t Even Know They Still Had a Team!
Posted On 31 Jul 2008 By Bad Kermit. Under: Broadcasters & Journalists, Cubs.
LOU PINIELLA enters a room where a party is taking place. The party-goers look rich and snobby. Lou appears as though he has just been thrown out of a bar, which he has. Lou has crashed the party for one purpose and one purpose only. To win back the love of his life, who is currently ... Read More
Friday Night Fukudome: Baker vs. Yost
Posted On 14 Mar 2008 By Bad Kermit. Under: Around the MLB, Ex-Cubs, Friday Night Fukudome, NL Central.
I'm not going to lie. I haven't been too pleased with the lineups Lou has proposed this week. Despite his fascination with Ryan Theriot at the top of the lineup, though, Lou is still the cream of the NL Central managers. If you look around at the rest of the NL Central's skippers, you'll find some real ... Read More
