Hire Jim Essian

The Cubs traded the pride of Triton College to the Washington Nationals in exchange for three prospects. God speed, Tom Gorzelanny. I always liked you a lot better than Carlos Silva. ... Read More

With all the Carloses on this team, it's only fair to make them fight to the death. One of Carlos Marmol, Carlos Pena, Carlos Silva, and Carlos Zambrano HAS to have the best year in 2011. But who's it going to be? It could be anyone! Except for Silva. Into the Fukudome! VS. VS. VS. Carlos Marmol Carlos Pena Carlos Silva Carlos ... Read More

If Mike Quade wanted to endear himself to Cubs fans, perhaps he should have avoided using the same unoriginal rallying cry that the infuriating Dusty Baker used during the 2003 season. "Why not us?" asked Quade at his introductory press conference. Well, Mike, I think I can take a crack at that. You don't have a first ... Read More

As I'm sure you already know (and as Ned Ryerson and Pre reminded me), Cubs pitching coach Larry Rothschild picked up HIS contract option and will return for the 2011 season. I'm glad Rothschild is going to be back. It's pretty clear now that the idiotic way that the Cubs' pitching staff was handled in the early 2000s ... Read More

I definitely expected the wheels to just flatten. Or to pop off entirely due to the stress of carrying around such weight. If you were shocked that Carlos Silva was having a ton of success with the Cubs this year, you're probably acting like an insufferable know-it-all right now. Silva's short start against the Dodgers just before ... Read More

I think I'm having a Cub mid-life crisis. I had no idea who the Cubs were playing last night until I logged on to MLB At-Bat to watch highlights from Stephen Strasburg's debut. I wasn't surprised to learn that the Cubs had suffered another one-run loss to another terrible team. I can't remember the last time I ... Read More

The joke is on me. I sat through that disaster of a game last night along with a bunch of other idiots. I don't want to relive the nightmare in my head, but I do want to know from you guys. Is this team better or worse than you expected? I think I said on Kaplan's ... Read More

I kid you not. The new Muskbox image was barely altered. Yes, there was a giant amount of white space where the HJE logo now sits. I like to imagine when Carrie saw it, she let out an exasperated sigh. Anyhow, I love it, I have adopted it, and I am embracing it. I completely ... Read More

There are times when the lede of an article is so cornily stupid, that it makes me question the existence of a loving God. Times when the lede is so embarrassingly awful to read, that I as a blogger don't even care what the rest of the article is about. I just know that I have to fisk ... Read More

My brain is still reeling over yesterday's decision to send Carlos Zambrano to the bullpen. Whether you love Zambrano (like Dolan) or don't (like me), you'd be a total fucking idiot to like this idea. In the Zambrano post, paintersix (sorry to pick on you) said, "I think it's a terrible idea but .....if it works were all ... Read More