This is the type of topic that gets the clownish hacks at the Bright One’s sports section to pen 700 words instead of actually writing about, you know, sports. However, I have seen nary a reference to this anywhere and wanted to throw it out there to see if anyone can confirm or my deny my optimistic hunch that the Cubs have finally decided to rid themselves of the decade-long hackneyed distraction that has been the “7th Inning Guest Conductor”.
When outgoing Cubs President John McDonough arranged last season’s Ultimate 7th Inning Stretch Conductor contest I wondered aloud if McDonough was using the term “ultimate” literally, meaning “final”. At least it was my hope that he was.
My beef with this practice actually has had less to do with the actual performance at the park than with the obligation of the TV and radio broadcast teams to interview the guest conductor while the game is going on. After all, when you’re at the game, it hardly matters. You’re up for the stretch anyway, you sing “Take Me Out to the Ballgame”, you sit down and you get back to watching the game.
But those at home, or in their cars, have not been not so lucky. If the guest was an ex-Cub or an athlete who knew his place, then the annoyance was minimal. But waaaay more often than not, the guest would be some vacuous entertainer whose sole interest was a movie, or TV show, or book, or charitable endeavor that needed to be plugged. Subsequently, viewers and listeners were subjected to a half-inning where suddenly it was all about the guest and the game suddenly took a back seat. This would become even more aggravating when the game was in the balance. You’re fretting a one-run lead or one-run deficit but Pat and Ron or Len and Bob are constantly steering the action to, say, faux Cubs fan John Cusack’s latest chick flick.
It was an interesting idea at first. Harry died right before Spring Training in 1998 and McDonough, in another in what was a series of masterstrokes that he executed during his 25+ years of working in the Cubs’ Marketing Department, came up with the idea to honor Harry by having Cub fans who were well-known sing “Take Me Out to the Ballgame”.
The idea didn’t take long to jump the tracks, though. It quickly went from being celebrity Cub fans to anybody coming through town with something to plug. Remember that silly Tae-Bo craze and the guy–Billy Blanks–who was at the forefront of it? Well, I wouldn’t either, but for the fact that I still remember when this goof was tapped to sing and admitted, during the interview, that it was the first baseball game he had ever attended.
For me, though, the straw that broke the camel’s back occured in only its second season–1999. Marion Ross, best known as Mrs. Cunningham on the 70’s sitcom Happy Days had come through town. I was driving home from work and listening to the game on WGN-AM. It was in July or August, and I’m pretty sure the Cubs were playing the Brewers. It was a humid, overcast day and the Cubs had begun, as per custom, to play out the string in another depressing and disappointing campaign.
So Marion Ross was being interviewed by Pat and Ron in the bottom of the 6th. Her plug? She was being honored by the town of Marion, IL because, you know, her first name was the same as the town whose claim to fame, as far as I could tell, had been that it was the home of Pete Rose while he was doing time for tax evasion.
She was being honored because her name was “Marion”
To frame the scene, the Cubs had been down by alot of runs. During the inning that Marion Ross was in the booth, the Cubs kept scoring runs and inched closer to tying the game. Sadly, this meant that whatever enjoyment I had at the Cubs coming back was muted by the dreadfully extended interview that poor ole’ Pat Hughes was obligated to give Miss Ross. With Jose Hernandez at the plate, the following exchange–to the best of my memory–took place:
Pat Hughes: So “Marion Ross Day” will be taking place in Marion, Illinois on Thursday.
Marion Ross: Uh huh. That’s right
Pat: The pitch to Hernandez. He swings and hits one to left! Towards the corner! That one’s got a chaaaaaance….GONE!
Ron Santo: ALLLL RIGHT!
Marion: WOOOOOOOO! Are we winning now?
Pat: No, Marion, the Cubs trail by only one now.
While I’m paraphrasing (it has been 9 years), that’s essentially the exchange that took place, I swear. From that day forward, I have operated under the premise that these silly interviews are not fair to the broadcasters and that they are a hindrance to the listener/viewer’s enjoyment of the telecast. Len Kasper does a very good job with the interviews on the TV side, but even he, I suspect, has days where he dreads having to turn his back on the game to pay attention to his interviewee.
So far, there has been no mention of this practice continuing. I’m hopeful that this remains the case. I think after ten seasons, most people would agree that it’s time to pull the plug on this nonsense. Play a tape of Harry leading it and let the new tradition take over.
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When I first started reading this I was furious at the notion of getting rid of the guest conductor. But, as I meandered through your bone-chilling account of one of the worst possible interview scenarios possible, I realized you do have a point…barely.
C’mon man, Harry did this for years, it isn’t something they just started 10 years ago; he just happened to die 10 years ago. The guest conductor is to honor Harry; and a lot of games it puts a little “something” in there when you need it most. I look forward to seeing how good, or more often than not, how bad the guest conductors can sing it. My personal favorite is the Jeff Gordon calling it Wrigley Stadium, and then botching the song while reading it off of a sheet of paper while 40,000+ Cubs fans booed him the entire way through.
You act as if Harry was the most conscientious broadcaster in the booth. Hell, the guy was blitzed the majority of the time and didn’t even know where he was by the 7th inning on most days. Talking about Will Ferrel’s new flick or Lieutenant Dan’s Band’s next show probably keeps more people informed than Harry himself did back in the day. I especially enjoy when good luck charms like Bonnie Hunt make it into the booth, because we always seem to break out of a deficit while she’s in attendance.
It doesn’t really matter, because they won’t get rid of what has now become one of those special moments in baseball, as well as a staple of Wrigley Field.
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Mike D. reply on March 25, 2008:
I never implied that Harry was a conscientious broadcaster–that’s your inference. Toward the end of Harry’s career I used to hate listening to the games on the radio in the middle three innings because he was awful at providing clear play-by-play. So you’re not going to get an argument out of me there. Similarly, you can find me ranting on Desipio about how much I would love to launch Santo from the booth because I find him wholly irritating.
As a point of clarification, I should also point out that Harry being blitzed is perception, not reality. A lifetime of drinking away from the field, along with advancing age, made him incoherent, but everyone who worked with him refutes the notion that he was drinking during games. Ask Jimmy Piersall or Steve Stone.
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JayBandit reply on March 25, 2008:
Fair enough; I still say they should keep it.
I love listening to Santo; it’s like listening to the game with your grandpa in the room with you. It’s a lot better than Dan “Please Shoot Me” Pleasac announcing…
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Brad D reply on March 26, 2008:
Ron Santo is simply awesome….when augmented by the extrordinarily likeable Pat Hughes. Pat keeps
Ron in check most of the time by mocking him playfully. Ron’s inflated sense of self, is oft, cheritably
encourages by Pat in instance where Pat throws Ron a setup softball question like, “So Ronny, we have th
Theriot at first with no one out and Hank White is up to bat, do we bunt him here or swing away?”
Pat is such a nice guy and, Santo such a loveable doofus, so unfit for radio in terms of his speech (dis)
abbillities, that I find their radio broadcasts to be the funniest part of my day. If I want to here wrote
bland, typical baseball tripe, I’ll watch the TV. But when I want laugh out loud at two of Chicago’s
treasures Pat and Ron it’s all about WGN. Plus the radio is the only reliable place to pick up the games.
I wish the Cubs would broadcast out of one station WGN, with the occasional ESPN or Nationally broadcasted
Oleg reply on March 26, 2008:
I, for one, have little need for Santo’s analisys. Frankly, I find the comraderie between Santo and Hughes to be very good. Hughes would be masterful doing the games by himslef, a la Vin Scully, but I certainly don’t think having Santo in the booth actually takes anything away from listening to the game.
However, this 7th inning non-sense needs to go. I think Mike makes a good point, it’s not the actual singing of the song, it’s the interviews. Holy shit do those suck. I don’t mind the idea of letting some high school team that just won a championship or something sing the song. I don’t care if Ozzy Osbourne sings every damn day. Just get these morons off my radio or TV when the game is on. I don’t think that’s too much to ask for.
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My vote is still to just have Santo do it every game. Or Kellie Pickler.
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RV reply on March 26, 2008:
Do they sell milk here to go with the Apple Jacks?
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I say we sing a different song. What’s the point of singing “Take Me Out To The Ballgame” when you’re already at the ballgame?
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Oleg reply on March 26, 2008:
The Ramones “Beat the Brat” or King Missle’s “Detachable Penis” perhaps? Too long?
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I thought this post would maybe be about those atrocious AT&T ads I keep hearing on the Score.
Also if they want to continue the tradition, just have a recording of Harry singing play. Who would be against that?
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I say have Ditka do it every game…they are always looking for ways to speed up the game
It does suck if you can only get to a couple games a year and your guest conductor for that game is the dude who used to play Urkel
Maybe they can have K-Fuk do it in Japanese and turn it into a learning experience for everyone…very educational
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Jeff Gordon: It’s great to be out here at Wrigley Stadium!!
Rest of Chicago: BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!
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Santo does it every game, or it’s strippers/pornstars. If the Cubs are losing bad, they put on a live show.
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“If the guest was an ex-Cub or an athlete who knew his place…”
Gary Sheffield takes exception, Huey.
“…the following exchange–to the best of my memory–took place… While I’m paraphrasing (it has been 9 years), that’s essentially the exchange that took place, I swear.”
No… We pretty much trust you implicitly on this count.
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I’m all for Ron handling it every day. I personally think he deserves it.
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I really think the 7th inning stretch needs to go. The first couple years after Harry died, it wasn’t too bad. People knew why they were there. Most of the people doing it now have probably never even heard of Harry Caray. If it must be done, then Ron Santo is the only one who should be doing it. He’s the only current broadcaster who’s as beloved as Harry was. He’s a terrible announcer, but I love the guy. If he can’t do it, get a recording of Harry. That’s what the minor league stadium in Peoria does and I find that much more enjoyable then listening to half wit celebrities discuss their latest project. If Ronnie can’t do it every day, you get celebs who actually are Cub fans or ex Cubs, people who would understand why they were there. It’s a pretty short list: Bill Murray, Ernie Banks, Billy Willams, Rick Sutcliffe, Mickey Morandini, etc. Fuck, even Jim Belushi would be better than having to suffer through Ozzy Osbourne or another Kellie Pickler incident. If I were Len and Bob, I’d have pushed her skinny ass out the window.
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level5 reply on March 26, 2008:
Can I add Ronnie Woo Woo Wickers to your list?
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JackB reply on March 26, 2008:
Take-woo-me-woo-out-woo-to-the-woo-ballgame-woo. Sweet Jesus, it’d be longer than the Whitney Houston rendition of the national anthem. And it would STILL be better than Kellie Pickler.
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Put me in the Santo camp as well. I love the guy, and he really is Harry’s heir apparent.
I could also see letting real Cubs celebrities sing when they are in town also. Like JackB says, it’s always fun when they are able to get someone like Bill Murray or Ernie Banks.
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Play a recording of Harry every 7th inning stretch and spare us the 385 appearances by Tom Dressen.
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“… spare us the 385 appearances by Tom Dressen.”
Amen.
But do let Bob Uecker sing again. He sparked a hell of a Cubs rally against the Brewers last year after getting roundly booed by the Wrigley faithful.
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I largely agree, but I think you picked a bad example in Cusack. The few times I’ve seen him do the seventh inning stretch, he seems completely annoyed by having to do the interview, in a “hey, I’m trying to watch the goddamn game here!” sort of way.
He’s an avid Cub fan, so I’ve got no beef with him.
If they are going to keep it, I’d love for it to be limited to ex-Cubs and just a handful of the top, honestly-huge-Cub-fan celebrities. I actually really enjoy it when they dig up some random ex-Cub from my youth and I get to find out what he’s doing now (inevitably sitting on his ass in some warm climate, drinking beer and occasionally coaching at a high school clinic).
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Mike D. reply on March 27, 2008:
You obviously didn’t click the link under John Cusack’s name, Jowls.
Get with the program! John Cusack–BAD.
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