Category Archives : Ex-Cubs


SHOCKER! Sosa Did Steroids

If anyone is surprised about this, you should punch said person in his giant Mongoloid head. At this point does anyone even still care? I’m just going to assume that everyone who has ever been paid to play baseball has taken steroids. I’m also going to eagerly anticipate the day when Albert Pujols’ name comes […]


The Cubs Would NOT Be Better with DeRosa and Wood Right Now

It’s not a question of whether or not you’ve heard it this season. It’s a question of how many times you’ve heard it. It’s some variation of “This team would be so much better if they’d kept Kerry Wood and Mark DeRosa.” Maybe over the course of the season, those people will be right, but […]


FRANKS AND BEANS!

It’s not every day a 95 year old millionaire dies and I’m sad about it, but forgive me for donning the Bob Greene/Rick Telander/Mitch Albom Maudlin Cap of Sentimentality today as I report with a heavy heart that Herman Franks passed away early yesterday. As I had described to GROTA last September–right before these cockbags […]


Saving Grace

I’m going to guess that this is going to incense some of you. Others are going to read it, pull a Bob Sugar, and say, “Finally, someone said it!” Some of you will question my baseball acumen. Others will say, “Hey, maybe Kermit wears a diaper for a reason other than his stupidity.” But I […]


Friday Night Fukudome: Hill vs. Patterson vs. Pie vs. Sosa

Assuming Rich Hill ends up getting traded to Baltimore, that is an awful lot of Cubs castoffs who have been traded to the Orioles. So, let’s throw some of the “top” players into the Fukudome and see what we get. VS. VS. VS. Rich Hill Corey Patterson Felix Pie Sammy Sosa [poll id="43"]


Let’s Be Contrarian and Thank Marquis

Everyone is piling on Jason Marquis and is thrilled that he is no longer in Chicago. As you know, I’ve been hoping that Sean Marshall would win Marquis’ job for the past two seasons. But instead of adding to the pile let’s instead flash back to Sunday, September 16, 2007. You remember 2007. Lou Piniella’s […]


I'll see you on the ice, Gibby.

Bleeding Jimmy Essian

Bleeding Jimmy “Skip” Essian here, checking in today on Bleeding Jimmy Essian Day. Any day that invokes my name is a great day, although it’s unfortunate that this day came because of a guy more suited to be dictator of a Third World Nation.  No matter. Let’s talk about bleeding and Jimmy Essian. There are […]