Friday Roundup: The “XBONERTIME!” Edition

Courtesy of The Onion

Courtesy of The Onion

If it seems like I’ve been neglecting you, I HAVE. You know. Life ‘n’ junk. Plus, now that the new Xbox is out, don’t expect daddy to come home straight from work any time soon. If only UPS would get here.

Your tips are as appreciated as a reckless UPS driver who gets his route done quickly with no breakage.

  • I hope everyone’s thoughts are with the people of Washington, IL and all of the other communities affected by the storm last week. That said, GO BEARS FANS.
  • The MLB Network does this dumb shit, too.
  • To be fair, it IS pretty obnoxious when people act like they’re actually enjoying Cubs games.
  • We haven’t done a quiz in a while, so did this guy win the Cy Young? (HT: Jason)
  • I hope everyone is okay, because this propane accident is awesome. (HT: level5)
  • This was somehow Jay Cutler’s fault.
  • If you didn’t order a next-gen console, CALL YOUR MOTHER every once in a while.
  • It really whipped the llama’s ass.
  • Futurama loved its maths.
  • Dolphins don’t have the luxury of tube socks.

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