Several days and 36 innings later, I’m back from Spring Training. What did I learn about the Cubs? They’re bad. In all the games I attended, they held a lead for about one inning. Neat. Even when their starting pitchers were recording outs, they were hard-hit. But, hey, I saw at least one Cub home run every game. And two by Paul Konerko! Soon, folks, we’ll have some real baseball to obsess over.

And, oh, hey, the fine folks at Razzball asked me to do the 2013 Cubs fantasy baseball preview. They called me an “expert”. Ha! Seriously, if you’re not reading Razzball for your fantasy needs, you must not have fantasy needs.

Your tips are as appreciated as me missing the entire snowstorm of the last week. Nice timing, me.

• Mark Prior is back…maybe?
• Speaking of Dusty Baker, he’s still a childish asshole.
• Remembering the Matt Garza trade for no reason.
• Does anyone NOT hate the rooftop owners?
• Jose Canseco is the gift that keeps on giving.
• We did a remote from Arizona. well, I was the remote. And Dolan moved. Here’s the audio if you won’t want to look at our faces. But why would you want that? Oh, and here’s a link for non-Apple users. (HT: Derek) You know. Independent thinkers.
• Your mom’s a bottomless pit. (HT: level5)
• Back to the Future II is a movie of LIES.
• I know you like to think your shit don’t stink.
• The 10 most incompetent time travelers.
• Fun with grammar!
• The screaming babies on my flight were not as cool as these people.