I’m not ordinarily a big fan of the festivities surrounding the All-Star Break. I hate Chris Berman and Joe Buck. I don’t know 75% of the “celebrities” in the softball game. I think following baseball minor leaguers is somewhat of a futile exercise. And it drives me nuts that there are forty-seven commercial breaks between the ceremonial first pitch and the actual first pitch of the All-Star Game. But I watched as much as I could this year, and I enjoyed it, especially when the bar I was at chose not to play Fox’s audio feed of the ASG. And it’s always fun watching the senior circuit take those whipper-snappers behind the woodshed and make them cut themselves a switch. Even if it means having to root for a Tony LaRussa team. To be fair, though, the ASG was MADE for LaRussa. He gets to make a dozen pitching changes!

I appreciate your tips as much as Royals fans appreciated Robinson Cano’s 0-fer.

• Of course Ryan Dempster does.
• Bud Selig remains absolutely clueless.
• Behold! As Jim Essian totally outmanages Lou Piniella. Additionally, Joe West, Rob Dibble, and Hawk Harrelson were always cunts.
• Speaking of which…
• Game of Thrones Season 2 in 16-bit RPG form.
• Silence of the Assassin Bug.
• I guess that’s one way to apply for a job. (HT: EnricoPallazzo)
• It’s nearly impossible to kill off a hero? No shit, Sherlock.
• I never understood why anyone thinks Daniel Tosh is funny, so this is awesome to me.
• Do you love or hate Stephen King? I find most of his work to be like a summer popcorn film in paper form. Entertaining and sometimes fun with little nutritional value. Except for The Dark Tower and The Stand. Those were fucking awesome.
• Although now there are rumors that it might have been a basking shark, this is still pretty pants-shittingly scary. (HT: level5)
• TWEET OF THE WEEK: This is Twittery enough. ZimBear is going around the country, and you can follow him on Twitter.
• NIGHTMARE FUEL OF THE WEEK: This testicle-eating fish EARNED this perfect headline
• FEED READ OF THE WEEK: I suspect the xkcd spinoff site will be terrific.
• YOUR AWESOME OLD MOVIE CLIP OF THE WEEK: I will be buying the hell out of this.
  

Enjoy the return of “meaningful” baseball, folks.