Hire Jim Essian

The playoffs begin this weekend, and it's time to start making our brilliant playoff picks. So, let's do that. Now. IN THE FUKUDOME. In case you want a bit of a hint, the Rays are already up 1-0 in their series. VS. Tampa Bay Rays Texas Rangers VS. Detroit Tigers New York Yankees VS. Arizona Diamondbacks Milwaukee Brewers VS. St. Louis Cardinals Philadelphia Phillies ... Read More

I'm excited that the 2011 playoffs start tonight, in September. I'm particularly excited about the prospect of the World Series ending, rightfully, in October. I'm a bit baffled as to why both ALDS series are on tonight and why both NLDS series are on tomorrow. But if there's one thing Bud Selig has taught me, it's EXPECT ... Read More

The 2011 season ground to a merciful halt yesterday. In a beautiful display of symmetry, it ended much the same way it started, with Ryan Dempster walking everyone in the park, serving up a grand slam, and losing to a shitty team. In case you missed the past six months of baseball, the Cubs didn't make the playoffs ... Read More

Today, Pre pointed out to me an interesting clause in Carlos Zambrano's contract. From Cot's Baseball Contracts: Zambrano receives 2013 player option if 1) he is first or second in 2011 Cy Young vote or if he finishes in top 4 in 2012 Cy Young vote and 2) he is healthy at end of 2012 Zambrano's player option is $19.25M. That means ... Read More

Whenever a team lets a player go for no compensation, although they say all the right things and wish him well, they are secretly hoping that the player sucks throughout the course of his career. You hope he becomes Mark Prior or Matt Clement or Rueben Quevedo. You certainly don't want him to become the greatest pitcher of ... Read More

Throughout the course of his 22 seasons as manager of the Chicago White Sox, Ozzie Guillen was a lot of things to a lot of people. Pariah. Messiah. Leader. Follower. Goat. Venezuelan. Understandable. Misunderstood. Controversial. Christ-like. Winner. Loser. Friend. Roman. Countryman. Healer. Not-stop-believer. ... Read More

There is a very real and sad possibility that last week's Muskbox may be the last one of the season. Meaning they will certainly address those last remaining questions you have about the Cubs. All of the important stuff, like HOW DID THE CUBS FARE WITH RUNNERS IN SCORING POSITION IN 2000??? The Muskbox is nothing if ... Read More

The only reason to watch the Cubs for the remainder of the season is to watch Starlin Castro hopefully erase Juan Pierre from any bit of Cub trivia. Before the end of the season, when anyone asks you, "Hey, who was the last Cub to collect 200 hits in a season?" you will no longer have to answer, "Juan ... Read More

I was hoping to see Starlin Castro get his 200th hit at Wrigley Field, so I watched the game today. While he didn't become the first Cub since Juan Motherfucking Pierre to reach 200 hits, there were a couple notes from the game that I found interesting. The paid attendance was just over 30,000. While it is a Wednesday ... Read More

I offer you this submission. Never has there been a more hate-worthy Cub shortstop than Ryan Theriot. Not Jeff Blauser. Not Neifi Perez. Not Alex Gonzalez. Not Ronny Cedeno. All of those guys were terrible, but they either had some redeeming moments (Gonzalez), were hated solely because of misuse (Perez), were harmless simpletons (Cedeno), ... Read More