Sweet Uncle Lou is on Vacation
Sorry, gang. The so-called HJE staff is heading to the game today (WHY?) and then going out of town this weekend, so we didn’t get around to the Roundup. Our general malaise toward this team will be cured soon enough, and I’ll try to tweet hilarious stuff from the game to make up for my slackership. Have a great long weekend, everyone. GO USA!
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BigFlax
PenFoe
StPatrick
CT
CactusMcHarris
Geez, for your vacation the Cubs should win at least one game, preferably the one today. I’ll be looking for you in the stands (we get WGN north of the border!). Hope y’all have a good time.
This team is a bunch of mutherhumpers. I was all set for a season of pleasant, inept hilarity. Theriot flailing his tiny limbs at flares over the infield. Soriano styling after flyballs and losing them. John Grabow existing. Instead I’m treated to an ugly, cringe-inducing year that’s more uncomfortable to watch than an episode of Curb your Enthusiasm. I’m getting wistful for the Sammy Sosa era. Seriously.
So, Sully told us Z’s an asshole and needs to be run out of town, even though he said in his mailbag that Zambrano does not have anger issues and is happy and good to be around 99.9% of the time. So we are going to do everything we can to help Al Ricketts and the frumpy hobbit shine a light on Z’s “deficiencies” so the fans will be glad to see the back of him. Amirite?
Cubs win! Cubs win!
(well, I thought it was notable because they haven’t been)
The only outstanding moments this season have been the clubhouse fart-lighting, and the Dickball video of the Cubs that my neighbor showed me. Otherwise the season has gone from mediocre to just awful. It looks as though the players are trying to showcase what they can do as individuals – I mean, Theriot actually ran out a double, but their efforts are not being coordinated. There is no managerial leadership. The lucky players will be the ones that get traded.
@Edelweiss –
So the Cubs can actually start planning for this year by trading Carlos Silva this year? I’m just picking him because he’s one of the few with positive trade value since he’s one of the few to be having an unexpectedly good year.
The Cubs should have a spectacularly bad year and a housekeeping commence. This near-mediocre stuff isn’t cutting it – I mean, they actually took one from Dusty this weekend, but the two other games – yech.
Breaking news………….Lou had another team meeting before yesterdays game. He did it in Arizona so the nosy Chicago media wouldn’t get wind of it. What was it about, you ask?.
First of all, a pair if women’s 5 inch heels, in a zebra print were found in the clubhouse, at Wrigley, last week. They don’t belong to a wife or girlfriend. No way!!! They are about a size 15 or 16, but look to be custom made, so no actual size can be found. Secondly, Lou has banned all displays of “vulgarity” in the clubhouse. That would include Dickball, the pre-game circle jerk, which Lou says tires young men out, and any other “flaunting” of the private parts. He doesn’t know who took the Dickball video, but, HA Ha, I do.