Geez, for your vacation the Cubs should win at least one game, preferably the one today. I’ll be looking for you in the stands (we get WGN north of the border!). Hope y’all have a good time.

So, Sully told us Z’s an asshole and needs to be run out of town, even though he said in his mailbag that Zambrano does not have anger issues and is happy and good to be around 99.9% of the time. So we are going to do everything we can to help Al Ricketts and the frumpy hobbit shine a light on Z’s “deficiencies” so the fans will be glad to see the back of him. Amirite?

The only outstanding moments this season have been the clubhouse fart-lighting, and the Dickball video of the Cubs that my neighbor showed me. Otherwise the season has gone from mediocre to just awful. It looks as though the players are trying to showcase what they can do as individuals – I mean, Theriot actually ran out a double, but their efforts are not being coordinated. There is no managerial leadership. The lucky players will be the ones that get traded.

Breaking news………….Lou had another team meeting before yesterdays game. He did it in Arizona so the nosy Chicago media wouldn’t get wind of it. What was it about, you ask?.
First of all, a pair if women’s 5 inch heels, in a zebra print were found in the clubhouse, at Wrigley, last week. They don’t belong to a wife or girlfriend. No way!!! They are about a size 15 or 16, but look to be custom made, so no actual size can be found. Secondly, Lou has banned all displays of “vulgarity” in the clubhouse. That would include Dickball, the pre-game circle jerk, which Lou says tires young men out, and any other “flaunting” of the private parts. He doesn’t know who took the Dickball video, but, HA Ha, I do.