Sweet Uncle Lou’s Friday Roundup: The “Spring Has Sprung, But Not on the Weekends”
Ah, spring in Chicago. The air is crisp, the birds are chirping, there is love horny desperation in the air. I hope you enjoyed your week of nice weather while you were sitting at your desks, Chicagoans. It’s going to be a chilly weekend. Be sure to snuggle up with your favorite porn. Roundup tips are always appreciated, occasionally used, and often baffling.
- Ron Santo is finally better at something than Vin Scully. But who’d have thought it would be walking?
- Tony LaRussa is taking the sophistication of the “NOT” joke to a whole new level!
- Battery Stance Guy!
- While I’m disappointed that there are fewer and fewer places to put my “NO FAT CHICKS” billboard, I’m even more disappointed at the Chicago Tribune‘s loose definition of “rendering.”
- What if Rick Ankiel were the only pitcher in the MLB?
- Wow. That one golfer’s text messages will shock you.
- Why do I get the feeling that Kevin Millar has something to do with this shitshow?
- Looking for a new job? How about giving space travel a shot?
- Tell me you wouldn’t tap the GPS lady.
- If you watched the Discovery Channel’s Planet Earth series, you should probably make plans to watch Life, which starts this Sunday, March 21.
- Not everyone loves Eddie Vedder, but EVERYONE loves Lee Elia.
- If you were the last person on earth, women still wouldn’t have sex with you. So, here’s what you should do with all that free time.
- World War II, as fought on Facebook.
- Yes, a third 7th Inning Stache link, but they were on a roll this week. Here’s another reason why the MLB is stupid and everyone wishes Bud Selig would just die.
- And, possibly, replace him with Dolan, who has the best ideas for “realignment” I’ve heard.
- If you think it’s hilarious when Dempster and Millar do “Who’s on First?” over and over again in different voices, then Parallel Lines might be right up your alley. Except it actually looks good.
- The video game boss lament.
- Well, THAT escalated quickly. (HT: Paintersix) Seriously, Lisa, call me.
- Another week, another Chat Roulette video. This one is quite awesome, though. It involves improvisational piano, and 0% of the penises normally found on Chat Roulette.
- Ryan Braun is a pervert. (HT: John)
- Your mom’s on Facebook, and I just poked her.
- It’s not easy working for minimum wage.
- Now this is dedication to a craft. (HT: Ned Ryerson)
- OZZIE’S TWEET OF THE WEEK: “Back to work loved is hard very hard but loved” Is there actual confirmation that this Twitter feed is real?
- NIGHTMARE FUEL OF THE WEEK: Actual Nightmare Fuel. It’s a movie that came out last year, and the plot summary sounds amazing. “Every October, live entertainment creeps into every town in America. People are transformed into monsters, while others pay gladly for horrific performances. But sometimes acting isn’t enough for the spirits that rule Halloween. And this is the year… the spirits want the encore of a lifetime.” Who will volunteer to see this and submit a review?
- FEED READ OF THE WEEK: It was bound to happen. beaarthurmountainspizza You’re weird, Internet.
Have fun getting snowed on this weekend, jerks. Living in Chicago year-round is the worst idea I’ve heard since managing the Cubs.
-Sweet Uncle Lou
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BigFlax
PenFoe
StPatrick
CT
CactusMcHarris
It’s real and it’s spectacular.
“Back to work loved is hard very hard but loved”
Hard lovin’? Is this a text from El Tigre Woods?
I am disturbed by so much of this this week, but hats of to the nerds who did WWII facebook, I hope their moms make them something special for dinner tonight.
I couldn’t find it in my collection, but that GPS lady picture is an old Elle McPherson pic, I’m pretty sure.
I may be a sick man, but I was hoping for something else on the Bea Arthur Mountains Pizza deal.
Charlie Manual’s suit is NOT black.