Oh, Jim Hendry. Just when you had me excited about the Xavier Nady signing and the Chad Tracy signing, you do something silly, like sign Kevin Millar. There is likely no way this move will affect the Major League club. Millar sucks and likely can’t outplay, well- anyone. If he makes his way to Chicago, the team is doomed, anyhow. He’s just an annoying, loudmouth moron who is excited that he gets to play grabass with Ryan Dempster during Spring Training. Remember how cute and HILARIOUS that was before the 2008 season? He’ll bring his absurdly capped teeth and his nonsensical catchphrases (“Cowboy up”? Really?) to any microphone that will listen to him. Millar was part of that incredibly annoying 2004 Red Sox team, and he’s basically an amplified version of all the bad parts of Todd Walker.

Since it’s only a minor-league deal, it’s hard to get actively angry about this move, but it sure is easy to hate Kevin Millar. And, Lord, I hate me some Kevin Millar.