We left the Muskbox in 2009 plantnapping and murdering ivy, and eating a Podsednik sandwich at Edmonds’ restaurant. This week, we discuss today’s starting lineup, try to trade Carlos Zambrano, and ask a payroll question that barely qualifies as a question. Into the Muskboxing ring we go!
I heard a rumor that the Yankees have inquired about Big Z. Is this true, and who would the Yankees give up to get him?
– Brad R., Bradley, Ill.
Am I just being a picky bastard, or does it bug anyone else when people start their questions with things like, “I heard a rumor…” or, “I read somewhere…” or, “I was in the stall next to Phil Rogers at the Tribune Tower, and the splash-back from his latest column made it sound like…”? Wouldn’t it be quicker easier for the Muskbox to completely fail at disproving these rumors if she at least knew where they were from? Like, if someone started a question with, “Gordon Wittenmyer said…” she wouldn’t even have to read the rest of the question. She could just say, “Gordon Wittenmyer is a retarded ginger, so disregard anything he writes.”
CARRIE: There have been reports out of New York with unnamed American League officials saying the Cubs are “dangling” Zambrano.
And, as everyone knows, the best source of information for a beat reporter about her own team is an unnamed “official” from an entirely different team in an entirely different league.
CARRIE: General manager Jim Hendry would not address the reports, but the bottom line is that Big Z has a no-trade clause. His agent, Barry Praver, said Hendry has not approached him about waiving the no-trade provision and Zambrano is not interested in waiving it.
“I fully expect him to come back in 2010 and pitch like the old Big Z,” Hendry said.
Good thing Hendry wouldn’t address those reports.
CARRIE: Zambrano has spent the majority of the offseason in Chicago.
Making him IMPOSSIBLE to trade. He’s grown roots here! ROOTS!
CARRIE: By the way, others on the Cubs with no-trade clauses include Derrek Lee, Ted Lilly, Kosuke Fukudome and Alfonso Soriano. Aramis Ramirez has a no-trade clause in 2010.
So, every big player whom Jim Hendry has either signed or extended in the past couple of years has a no-trade clause. Perfect.
With Soriano signed until ’14, Fukudome until ’11 and now Marlon Byrd until ’12, when and how does the Cubs brass expect to see Tyler Colvin (and other outfield prospects) called up? Would Colvin switch to right after Fukudome’s departure?
– Matt Z., Madison, Wis.
Whenever I get to thinking about how a “hot” Cub prospect will fit in with the MLB club, I calmly splay my fingers on a nice, solid table and smash them with a hammer. But, in this scenario, why the hell wouldn’t you move the tank-like Byrd to right and let Colvin flame out in center field?
CARRIE: It’s a cliche, but players like Colvin will let the team know when they’re ready for the big leagues, and when they are, the Cubs will find a spot.
Guys like Colvin have to DIG DEEP and RISE ABOVE ADVERSITY to MAKE THE SHOW. It TAKES HEART to get to the big leagues, and guys like Colvin, who PLAYS THE GAME THE RIGHT WAY, and HAS A GOOD FACE, have a good shot at SUCCEEDING AGAINST ALL ODDS.
CARRIE: Colvin is behind after undergoing Tommy John ligament replacement surgery on his elbow after the 2008 season. The other prospects, like last year’s No. 1 pick Brett Jackson, are a few years away. Colvin can play left, center or right. In the Minors, the Cubs try to move the outfielders around. Colvin played right field the majority of the time at Double-A Tennessee last season.
One would think that undergoing Tommy John surgery would actually move a player way up Jim Hendry’s depth chart. Does anyone get the feeling that the Muskbox wrote out a few answers to this question and was going to choose one of them, but she totally forgot to edit, so she just left them all in there?
What does the Cubs’ lineup look like right now?
– Drew H., Castalia, Iowa
NO GAMES TODAY
CARRIE: Manager Lou Piniella will be asked that at the upcoming Cubs Convention. Here’s one possibility: RF Fukudome, SS Ryan Theriot, 1B Lee, 3B Ramirez, CF Byrd, LF Soriano, C Geovany Soto, 2B Mike Fontenot or Jeff Baker.
I certainly hope Lou Piniella hits Soriano fifth, ahead of Byrd. Soriano had a bad year, but I’ll stand behind my assertion that his plate approach is best suited for the fifth spot in the lineup. I hate–HATE–that Theriot is hitting second, but if he is in the starting lineup over Starlin Castro, I don’t see a better option up- WAIT JUST A DAMN MINUTE! HOW THE HELL DID YOU TRICK ME INTO TALKING ABOUT THE LINEUP IN JANUARY???
What is going on with the payroll situation? I thought the Ricketts family was going to make a slight increase in payroll over ’09? The ’09 payroll was $134,809,000; the current payroll is $117,875,000.
– Zak K., Altamont, Ill.
Altamont, Illinois, huh? Where’s that? Do they have questions in Altamont? Because haphazardly adding question marks to the end of a declaratory statement does not a question make? See?
CARRIE: You sent this e-mail before the Cubs acquired Byrd, so I’m not sure what money you’re including for 2010.
“I’m sorry I didn’t get to your question earlier, but I was busy celebrating New Year’s Eve with a warm glass of milk, some flannel pajamas, and a quiet, dignified reading of Little Women.”
CARRIE: Byrd’s three-year, $15 million deal is backloaded, so he will be paid $3 million in 2010. The other money you haven’t factored in is what the eight arbitration-eligible players will get. The list includes: Baker, Fontenot, Tom Gorzelanny, Angel Guzman, Carlos Marmol, Sean Marshall, Koyie Hill and Theriot. They’ll all get raises. The ’10 payroll will likely be close to $140 million.
Wait. They’re PAYING for this crap? Wow.
Most fans are wondering why the Cubs aren’t as active in the free-agent market as other teams.
No, we’re not.
Obviously, it’s because of the large contracts the team already has.
Or the new ownership wanting to turn as big a profit on the team as possible, while staying competitive enough to keep idiots like me entertained until at least August.
Could you list some of those long player contracts and when they expire, including Hendry’s contract?
– Michael H., Green Bay, Wis.
HOW CAN IT BE POSSIBLE FOR A COMPUTER-LITERATE, FUNCTIONING HUMAN BEING TO NOT KNOW WHERE TO FIND THIS INFORMATION?
CARRIE: Soriano is signed through ’14 ($19 million each year), Ramirez is signed through ’11 ($16.75 million in ’10, $14.6 million in ’11), and Zambrano is signed through ’12 ($18.875 million in both ’10 and ’11; $19 million in ’12). Fukudome is signed through ’11 ($14 million in ’10, $14.5 million in 2011). Ryan Dempster is signed through ’12 ($13.5 million in ’10; $14.5 million in ’11; $14 million in 2012). Both Lee and Lilly are signed through ’10 and each will make $13 million. Hendry is signed through ’12.
This is YOUR fault, Michael H. I want you to read this answer until your eyes bleed, because YOU DID THIS.
I like the acquisition of Byrd, and it seems the starting lineup is set. However, the bench seems shallow in terms of position players. The Cubs have a ton of pitchers and little in terms of backups: Andres Blanco, Hill, Sam Fuld, and Micah Hoffpauir and either Baker or Fontenot. Unless Piniella is planning to use Marshall in left field or Zambrano’s bat, what are his bench plans?
– Andy G., Baltimore, Md.
Fortunately for you, I have the inside scoop on Lou’s plans:
- Drink strawberry daiquiris until February.
- Show up at Spring Training.
- Try a bunch of different lineups.
- Punch Hendry in the mouth for handing me this roster.
- Decide which of the good guys belong in the starting lineup.
- Cut the really shitty guys.
- Fill in the bench with the least shitty of the remaining guys.
CARRIE: There aren’t many openings, especially if they carry 12 pitchers. The names you listed are the likely bench players unless there’s a surprise this spring. Baker can play in the outfield if needed, Hoffpauir can back up at first and the corner outfield spots. The team will soon release a list of non-roster invitees for Spring Training who will contend, too.
WIGGUM: Hello, Mrs. Rivas? Mrs. Rivas, I’m sorry to say this, but your husband is DOA.
MRS. RIVAS: He’s DEAD!?
WIGGUM: Oh, no. NRI. NRI! I always get those two confused.
How many people have played second base since Sandberg retired? How does that compare with how many played third since Ron Santo retired?
– Mark G., Indianapolis
For the Cubs? Or just in general. In general, it’s probably millions. But Santo has been retired for longer, so his is probably tens of millions. Nay, BILLIONS.
CARRIE: Sandberg retired for the second time after the 1997 season, so beginning in ’98, there have been 37 different second basemen on the Cubs.
Holy shit. I’m actually glad she picked this question, just so I didn’t have to look this up myself. She’s also glad she picked this question, just so she didn’t have to look it up herself. Thanks, Ed Hartig!
CARRIE: That list includes Matt Stairs, Bill Mueller and Jason Maxwell, who each played one inning at second.
I’m not going to lie. I had never even heard of Jason Maxwell until just now. But this guy batted .333 with the Cubs with a 1.667 OPS, and they just LET HIM GO! This franchise is CURSED!
CARRIE: There are six who have played at least 1,000 innings at second, including Eric Young, Mickey Morandini, Todd Walker, Mark Grudzielanek, Fontenot and Mark DeRosa.
At first, that sounds like a lot, but then you realize it’s only about 111 games those guys have played at second. Then, you look at that list and realize you have no legitimate reason to continue watching this.
CARRIE: Santo’s last season with the Cubs was 1974, and the team has gone through 118 third basemen in 36 years. When Ramirez arrived in 2003, the post-Santo total was 98 from 1974-2003.
Considering how solid Ramirez has been, it’s actually pretty ridiculous that the Cubs have still managed to go through an additional 20 third basemen in the last 5.5 years.
CARRIE: Is 37 high or low? Beginning in 1998, the Cubs have used 41 different first basemen, 44 third basemen, 27 shortstops, 72 left fielders, 62 right fielders, 47 center fielders, and 23 catchers. That’s a lot of outfielders. Thanks to baseball historian Ed Hartig for his help (and double-checking my numbers).
I knew it.
I see that Carlos Silva has a better record in the National League. Do you think he’s better against NL teams than American League?
– Rick S., Tinley Park, Ill.
No. I think he’d be better against PCL teams.
CARRIE: Silva was 8-1 with a 3.83 ERA in 130 games in the NL with the Phillies, compared to 52-63 with a 4.88 ERA in 165 games in the AL with the Twins and Mariners. But he was used in relief in the NL, making one start, and was a starter in the AL, so you can’t really compare NL vs. AL. He’s a sinkerball pitcher, and that should be a plus at Wrigley Field.
It certainly worked for Jason Marquis!
