Or: How I Learned to Stop Caring About the Cubs and Hate Jim Hendry. It’s almost official. Jim Hendry is about to pull off the most monumentally stupid trade since he traded for Steve Trachsel. It appears that Milton Bradley is headed to the Seattle Mariners in exchange for the amazingly terrible Carlos Silva. (HT: Dolan) How amazingly terrible? Well, he followed a 2008 season in which he posted a 6.46 ERA with 8 games last year and an 8.60 ERA. Why only 8 games? Well, he was hurt for pretty much the whole year. Nice choice, Jim.
But wait. It gets better.
The amount of money remaining on Silva’s contract is actually MORE than that remaining on Bradley’s. According to Cot’s Baseball Contracts, Silva is owed $11.5M in 2010, $11.5M in 2011, and has a $12M mutual option (or, the no-brainer $2M buyout) in 2012. Bradley was owed $9M and $12M over the next two years.
Unless the Mariners are picking up all of Bradley’s contract AND eating part of Silva’s contract, this is the stupidest trade since Tiger Woods swapped Elin for that bar skank from Tool Academy. Bradley will be infinitely more valuable to Seattle than Silva will be to Chicago. If you truly hate Milton SO much that you’re willing to eat his entire contract, just cut him. Why eat MORE than his entire contract AND waste a 40-man roster spot on a completely useless player? And what the hell is Lou for, if not to keep headcases like Bradley in line? The Cubs would have been better off just keeping Bradley and trying to coexist than they are after making this trade.
Moreover, WHO THE HELL IS IN THE OUTFIELD NEXT YEAR? Soriano, Fukudome, and who? Scott Podsednik? For each game that Scott Podsednik starts as a Cub, I will destroy one nude photograph of his wife (SFW). If, on the other hand, I have to watch Sam Fuld get 100 starts next year, so help me God, I will burn this site and the entire internet to the ground.
Add Bradley to the disturbingly long list of players whose character the Cub organization completely assassinated (not that Bradley didn’t deserve it) before trading them. Kyle Farnsworth, Mark Prior, Sammy Sosa, Corey Patterson. You’ve got a new roommate.
Jim Hendry, you are a colossal (and I mean that in the most literal sense of the word) dumbass.
UPDATE: Apparently, the Cubs are getting $9M back in the deal, which means that’s about $6M they saved of Bradley’s contract. But that’s really only $4M, because they have to pay a $2M buyout in 2012. Hopefully the Mayans are right that the earth will have crashed into the sun by then, and we’ll all be dead. Because I would rather have all the water in my body instantly vaporized than live in a world where Carlos Silva makes more money to NOT pitch in one year than I will make in my entire lifetime.
With the extra $6M this year, Jim Hendry can presumably either: (1) go sign a terrible outfielder, or (2) feed himself for one week.
Pepto Bismol? Nah.
My Christmas list now includes industrial sized bottles of Jack Daniels and Dewars and two dozen cases or so of Old Style to be shipped not on Christmas morning, but sometime in April.
Santa, if you’re out there. I’ve been a good kid. Especially if compared to Jim Hendry.
I think I just coughed up blood.
They should have held their nose and kept Bradley. Ugh.
It looks as though you will have to redo the B-126! I’m predicting a top 10 finish.
@summerguy – I thought about that, actually. I’m hoping he doesn’t pitch in a single game, which makes the trade all that more idiotic.
I’m going to go ahead and register “HireLarryHimes” right now.
All the reports are saying that this is pending the Cubs getting money and or additional players. I say this isn’t even close to being okay unless we get in upwards of $5 million from the Mariners. That cash could then be flipped over to get Marlon Byrd and/or Matt Capps.
But yes, I don’t know why they couldn’t have pulled off a Sammy Sosa type deal where they give up most of his salary, but get a few midgets in the process.
Do we really want Hendry backloading deals to Byrd or Capps?
Hendry is beyond terrible.
Sign Aubrey Huff or Brian Giles to cheap 1 year deals.
Sign both guys if possible. Take our lumps in 2010 and get a new front office in here. I just can’t take the bumbling around anymore.
The biggest suprise is that we won 97 with this guy at the helm.
Paul Sullivan is saying the Cubs are going to get $9 million from the Mariners, which makes the deal slightly less idiotic.
Usually Jim waits until July or so to make us completely give up on the season, this year he didn’t want us to get our hopes up so he decided to just let us know ahead of time that we were going to be shit.
I just got one thing to say: FUCK
@summerguy – Can we change the T-79 rules to include GMs? Hendry just made my list of Cub Killers…
Oh, and this line – “so help me God, I will burn this site and the entire internet to the ground” – just made my Jack Daniels come out my nose. Thanks for that.
It just keeps getting worse. I think to myself.. “self; it cant get any worse”, but then it does.
Jesus. What a terrible trade. That 5 and 14 record in ’08 is making me queasy. I know Bradley had to go, but at what cost?
And I don’t get why some fans have this Sam Fuld crush. 1 RBI? Sure he can catch the ball, but playing in the big leagues is a 2 way street. You’ve gotta be able to hit a little bit, too, unless we’re time-warping back to 1992 when it was okay for your centerfielder to bring his limp dick to the plate.
A 2nd baseman would be nice, too, preferably one who isn’t: 1)Cajun and 2)a Hobbit.
Who the fuck is Carlos Silva??
Cubs.com used the teaser “Silva lining.” DIE.
Has anyone mentioned that it’s extremely unlikely Hendry did anything but Ricketts’ bidding in this case?
Well the ballclub is coming together nicely. One step closer to death and the Cubs are still a joke.
This fucker will make the team. I know he will. He will make the team and next June the Cubs will be beating the white sox 5-1 in the eighth and rothschild will bring him in and he will get the first two out and then he will give up a seeing eye single to fuckin juan pierre and then……
@kermit did you read “batting around with Ryan Theriot”. DOUBLE DIE.
I wouldn’t feel so bad about this deal, if I didn’t know the Cubs will Roster Silva.
Cutting Silva will only put egg on Hendry’s face.
@paintersix – “I’m going to have 600 at-bats when the season is over.” When the hell was this written? Or is that dope still counting them all up?
wake me up mommy, tell me I was just dreaming and the bad shitty men are all gone
@kermit- hell, I don’t know what he is talking about. Can you be a “team veteran” when you need a grappling hook and rope to climb outta the bathtub cause your shorter than papa smurf??
@oog – I think Ricketts is a dumbass as well. I mean, this makes no sense at all. Check this out it came from the canadian press. I found it by googling Carlos Silva:
‘Cubs trade for overpaid and underperforming right handed pitcher.”
Even the Canadian think we are stupid and they only like hockey.
My guess is that Milton Bradley has the best year of his career next year and continues to play well for the rest of his contract.
Just a guess.
But will be run out of 3 more cities and eventually kill an umpire.
An actual headline from MLB.com:
History will decide victor of Cubs-M’s deal
Won’t the future decide who got the better end of the deal or are they saying that history has already decided that both teams lose.
@paintersix – Ironically, hockey is the only sport worth watching in Chicago these days.