Hire Jim Essian

As our good friend Paul Sullivan pointed out in his Twitter feed, we’re finally down an Aaron (Heilman), and have only Miles left to purge. (HT: Luis) If I didn’t think Jim Hendry was going to trade Aramis, Marmol, Lee, Zambrano, and Lilly for Curtis Granderson, I might actually pat him on his pasty white back. As always, tips are appreciated. Roundup time.

• Hey, Milton Bradley finally won something. (HT: John)
• Sully Baseball has a funny recap of Game Seven of the 1979 World Series. No, the Cubs weren’t in it. Idiot.
• Finally, the morans guy explained!
• Those damn Yankees.
• The walls are NOT made of cheese, so try not to drool all over your keyboard.
• Apparently, the excellent Start Kyle Orton has swept Mike D. right off his feet!
• Depending on what the answer was, this would have made my day, too.
• I don’t care HOW you proposed to your wife. This guy just made you look terrible.
• Summarize your sex life with a Star Wars quote. I sure hope at some point during those movies, Luke Skywalker says, “I will die a virgin.”
• Why didn’t anyone tell me that someone was desecrating Douglas Adams’ corpse?
• These aren’t they. I’m good at English.
• If you think we need a jumbotron at Wrigley Field, think again.
  
• Go to jail, Hollywood. (HT: John)
• How well do you know your video game theme songs? Much better than you know the intricacies of the female anatomy, I’d wager.
• Scientists have discovered that HJE has actually been around for a million years!
• Try not to get a bunch of dust in your eyes when you read this letter.
• There’s something strange, all right.
  
• My new favorite site of the week is Totally Looks Like. (HT: Tom Trebelhorn) And if this were my kid, I’d kill it with fire.

Well, that’s it for me, folks. Dolan told me the word on the street is that Milton Bradley and Aaron Miles are about to get traded to the Rangers for Kevin Millwood. Thanksgiving, indeed.

-Sweet Uncle Lou