Some Final Thoughts Before We Never Speak of Milton Bradley Again
The further removed we get from the Milton Bradley suspension, the angrier I get at both sides. Milton Bradley is a raging asshole who brought all of his made-up woe upon himself. But Jim Hendry’s reaction to Bradley’s latest antics is infuriating as well. But if Tom Ricketts knows what he’s doing, the Bradley suspension should be the final nail in Hendry’s coffin.
First, Bradley. For some inexplicable reason, there are a few remaining Bradley defenders. You’re idiots. I’m speaking solely about defending his attitude, not his performance on the field. If you’re still sitting there in front of your monitor thinking to yourself, “Milton is just misunderstood,” or “It’s the fan’s fault and the media’s fault that Milton was unhappy,” well, then, I expect you’re too busy cutting out the eyes of all the people in your newspapers to really pay attention to this post, anyhow.
Milton’s takes a page from Jacque Jones in his latest sophomoric stunt, involving his mommy in his claims of racism. Hey, Milton? Grow the fuck up. My mom came to my defense once. In third grade. I was mortified then.
Incidentally, the meta headline (or whatever the hell you call it) of that story is outstanding:
Chicago Cubs’ Milton Bradley would return to team if allowed, his mother says
Rejected headlines:
Chicago Cubs’ Milton Bradley would return to team if he finishes all of his homework, his mother says
Chicago Cubs’ Milton Bradley would return to team if he eats all of his broccoli, his mother says
Chicago Cubs’ Milton Bradley would return to team if he wipes that look off his face, his mother says
Here’s my biggest issue with Milton. The article states as follows:
According to his mother, Bradley’s unhappiness in Chicago stems in part from racism that his 3-year-old son has faced at school.
Wait. A bunch of three-year-old kids who barely have the common sense to not shit themselves are hurling racist comments at one another between nap time and learning how to open a Capri-Sun without making it explode? I have a very hard time believing that. But you know what? I’m going to go ahead and give Charlena Rector (Milton’s mom) the benefit of the doubt. Somehow, the kids in Little Milty’s class got their hands on a rap album, or a video game, or the internet, or some other EVIL INFLUENCE that parents like to blame for their kids’ assholishness instead of just admitting that they’re shitty parents. And from that EVIL INFLUENCE, those kids learned “the N word.” And then they decided to use it in class. Something along the lines of, “Hey, did you just shove that crayon all the way up your nose? N—–, you are CRAZY!”
“When racism hit his 3-year-old baby in school, he couldn’t take that,” Rector said in a radio interview earlier this week, according to the Sun-Times. “Parents, teachers and their kids called him the n-word. He didn’t even know it was a bad word until his mom told him.”
Okay, you fucking liar. I’ll buy your rather incredulous statement that a kid or two might have used “the N word” around Little Milty. But you are actually suggesting that not only did the kids use a racial slur to describe Little Milty, but THEIR PARENTS AND TEACHERS did. Where does he go to school? In Louisiana in 1827? You’re more batshit crazy than your batshit crazy son.
Moreover, if this is anything less than utter horseshit, certainly the school which Little Milty attends will launch an all-out investigation of the teaching practices of his teacher.
INVESTIGATOR: So, what is on your syllabus after coloring?
TEACHER: Oh, I strip the children down to their underpants and whip them until they are broken.
INVESTIGATOR: I see. And after that?
TEACHER: After that, we do show-and-tell.
Not only did this bitch accuse a bunch of three-year-olds of racism. Her careless, hate-filled bullshit could SIGNIFICANTLY AFFECT THE LIFE OF A TEACHER. I’m pretty damn sure this teacher did absolutely nothing wrong. But the administration at this school has to protect its own ass, right? They’d be insane not to at least look into this, right? Fuck you, Charlena Rector, for insinuating this. And fuck you, Milton, if you actually told her this was going on.
When asked why her son shared the information only with her this season, Rector said, “Milton is a quiet person. Stuff like that, he keeps to himself. He doesn’t want to talk about that because he doesn’t think anybody cares. It is a heartbreaking situation.”
Also, he doesn’t talk about it, because it’s total bullshit. And nobody does care, because you’re both despicable human beings. I feel terrible for Little Milty. He is going to grow up in an environment of such hatred, and he’ll probably turn out as batshit insane as his father and grandmother (and grandfather, for that matter).
Fuck. Milton. Bradley.
All of that being said, and acknowledging the fact that Bradley is essentially the devil, Jim Hendry is a goddamn fool for suspending him. First of all, it is unprecedented for a team to suspend a player for comments he has made to the media. I know one might point to John Rocker’s suspension for his racial comments as precedent, but it is not. Rocker was suspended by Bud Selig and the MLB for his comments, not by the Atlanta Braves. Go do your Googley best and try to find me an MLB team that has ever suspended one of its players for being a dick. I don’t think it’s happened.
I strongly believe that the MLBPA would win a grievance against the Cubs, if they choose to file it. The MLBPA is the strongest player’s union of the major American sports. If they allow teams to start suspending players for comments made to the media, they are opening up a whole can of worms. Who’s to say Nomar Garciaparra shouldn’t have been suspended for looking pouty in the dugout toward the end of his Red Sox career? Or that Adam Dunn shouldn’t have been suspended for saying he doesn’t like baseball much?
But I couldn’t care less if the grievance is upheld or not, or if Milton gets paid or not. I do care about how this suspension affects my (tenuously) favorite team. It does. Negatively. Hendry has to have known for some time that Milton was not going to be a Cub on Opening Day of 2010. He also has to know that Milton’s performance this year has been considered poor by many. He also has to know that Milton’s continued pattern of shitheadedness isn’t helping his trade value. In fact, just about the only way to make Milton a more worthless bargaining chip is to publicly admit that you are sick of his bullshit and want him gone.
When Hendry suspended him, that’s exactly what he did.
How in God’s name is Hendry going to trade Milton now? The FIRST question out of any potential trade partner’s mouth is going to be, “So, why did you suspend him for the last two weeks of the season?” What the hell is Hendry going to say? “Because he’s a racist asshole who disrupted the clubhouse so much that not a SINGLE ONE OF HIS TEAMMATES rose to his defense after the suspension. You want to swap us Johan Santana for him?”
The disturbing thing is that this is not a new pattern of behavior for the Cubs. The Cub organization has a infuriating history of character assassination just before trading a player. Sammy Sosa, Kyle Farnsworth, and Corey Patterson all had their character called into question (justifiably or not) before they were traded. WHY? Why the hell would you do anything but protect the reputations of these guys if you’re trying to trade them? If I were trying to sell you a car, do you think the first thing I’d say would be, “It’s an unreliable piece of shit, and you have to start it with a coat hanger (when it does start), but- Well, there’s no but. This car fucking sucks. It’s ugly, it gets terrible gas mileage, and it once became sentient and drove through the wall of an orphanage.” Hendry may know baseball, but he’s an amazingly bad salesman.
The only explanation I can think of for this stupid Cub behavior is the same one I thought of when the Boston Red Sox unloaded Garciaparra, Pedro Martinez, and Manny Ramirez. After immortalizing those three players throughout their entire Red Sox careers, when the Sox were looking to unload them, all you heard about was what horrible people they were. Nomar was a whiner who laced his Milky Ways with arsenic at Halloween. Pedro was an old-man-beater whose jheri curl was styled by the blood of the innocent. Manny was a selfish clown who farted in the hot tub and tried to bite the bubbles.
Do the Red Sox and Cubs do this to try to brace the fans for losing one of their favorite players? If they are, it’s an unbelievably stupid strategy. As I mentioned before, the Cubs have effectively destroyed what little trade value Milton might have had. But even moreso, the majority of fans (yes, even idiot Cubs fans) are smart enough to not really give a shit about character. Until the very end, Sammy was beloved in this town, despite being a jerk throughout his entire career. Why? Because he hit home runs and was the greatest offensive force the Cubs had even seen. Why did we suddenly start to hate him? Not because of the cork. Not because he left a game early. Because he got out-homered, out-RBIed, and out-OPSed by Moises Alou and Aramis Ramirez in 2004. Suddenly, Sammy being Sammy pissed everyone off.
Not all Cubs fans are stupid. We don’t all need to love the guys in the blue pinstripes and need to hate them when they go. Hendry should have sucked it up, kept Milton on the active roster (hell, tell Lou Piniella to BENCH him if he bugs you that much), and preserved what little trade value he had. Now, Hendry is over a barrel and is going to trade yet another guy for absolutely nothing.
Nice choice, Jim.
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BigFlax
PenFoe
StPatrick
CT
CactusMcHarris
DON’T SAY MILTON BRADLEY!
Nuts & bolts…. we got screwed!
Grab your ankles, Hendry.
Just a few points, BK. Whether it was a team or MLB that suspended Rocker is a distinction without a difference. It’s still a suspension for comments he made to the media, and thus a precedent. And not to get all Googley on you, but our very own Cubs fined the immortal Julian Tavarez for calling San Francisco fans a bunch of “faggots.” Fine or suspension, it’s still punishment levied by a team, and again, precedent.
But on to your larger point. Do you really think that the other GMs in the game can’t read? Or just don’t have the Internet? Seriously, Bradley’s general assholiness both this year and in years past has been an ill-kept secret. Suspension or not, any GM with a brain in his head is going to know that Bradley is trouble waiting to happen. Hendry should have too, based on the knee injury when Bud Black had to tackle him in San Diego, or the time in LA when he lost his shit over something the outfield fans were saying to him (sound familiar?) or any number of other incidents. I don’t think getting the guy out of the way before he said the next stupid thing really could have hurt his value anymore than the dozen or so stupid things he said over the course of the year. The reaction of the team to the suspension shows that, if anything, Hendry should have done this sooner.
I agree with you, however, that Bradley, and his mother, are basically lying, pathetic individuals, and that unfortunately, if challenged, Bradley could probably get the suspension overturned. But as Paul Sullivan points out in the Trib today, it might be in Bradley’s best interest to keep his mouth shut for once and just take the suspension, in the hopes of not scaring off what little interest there might be in him on the trade market. Bottom line: the Cubs weren’t ever going to be able to get rid of him without either eating most of his contract or taking back an equally bad one in return. Oliver Perez, anyone?
There is a huge difference between the MLB suspending a player and an individual team suspending a player. A suspension from Bud Selig and the MLB has gone through much more “official” steps and will be far less likely to be overturned than one from a team. Saying it’s a “distinction without a difference” is just flat-out wrong.
Fines are completely different than suspensions. Teams impose fines all the time. Hell, the Yankees fined David Wells $100K for his autobiography, and there was no uproar. The difference is that those guys are still allowed to perform under their contracts and get paid for them. A suspension is a totally different beast, which is why suspensions are almost always appealed.
Yes. I think the GMs in baseball cannot read and have no internet access. Solid interpretation of my point.
MLB suspensions far less likely to be overturned? Just about every suspension issued by MLB, that are appealed get reduced, except for the PED suspensions, where the penalties have been collectively bargained under pressure from Congress. Even Bradley’s first suspension this year (remember that one?) got reduced.
As for the fine issue, you do realize that the Cubs are paying Bradley, don’t you?
But really, BK, how does suspending Bradley hurt his value? Let me ask it differently–how could he have had any value left after all the things he said during a season when he performed as poorly as he did?
If I’m a teacher that has ever been near Bradley’s kid, I sue their asses for slander (assuming the accusations are as untrue as they appear to be).
I get your argument about Bradley, but um . . . are you saying Hendry somehow tarnished Bradley’s reputation by suspending him? Think about it. That’s like saying Hendry defiled a 3/4-full port-a-potty by peeing in it. Do you really think there was a single GM in baseball who learned of the suspension and thought, “Wow, this was out of the blue. Good thing I learned of this brand new Milton Bradley ‘character flaw’ before calling Hendry with my Chase Utley for Milton offer.” Including Bradley in the discussion with Nomar, Pedro, Manny, and Sosa is not real sound reasoning. People wanted those players.
Come on. If an employee tells a newspaper, “My boss, my company, my co-workers, and all their customers are a bunch of losers who made me suck by osmosis” your ass is fired. Of course he got suspended. And the fact that it’s the Cubs who suspended him is a huge bonus against any Player’s Union grievance. I would guess he’ll probably get paid, But if your own team wants you suspended for berating the entire organization and fan base, you’re getting suspended. The Bruce Miles story made the decision pretty easy. Unless you’re Michael effing Jordan, you can’t get away with insulting your boss.
I agree Hendry has diminished Bradey’s value with a suspension. Hendry will now have to eat $10,600,000 instead of $10,599,999 in salary to unload him.
First, those MLB suspensions are reduced, not overturned. Second, the reason most team suspensions aren’t overturned is because they’re for things which are SO RIDICULOUS (read: Vince Coleman injuring 3 people for throwing fireworks at them) that a suspension is totally warranted.
Second, I understand that the Cubs are paying Bradley, but they’re not allowing him to do his job.
I agree with you and Chuck that Bradley’s value was basically zero. But if there was one iota of value left, it’s definitely gone now.
You’re missing the point. Hendry is going to do everything in his power to trade Milton in the offseason. If he hadn’t suspended Milton and would have just had Lou bench him, he could have said to other GMs, “Milton didn’t really fit in with the clubhouse and isolated himself from the team, but the only reason we benched him at the end of the season was because we wanted to see what Sam Fuld, Tyler Colvin, and Jake Fox could do.” Now, it’s clear Milton was shelved because he’s a miserable piece of shit. Like I said, if there was trade value left, it’s gone.
I agree. And how about this? If Milton’s anger at the people of Chicago is based on his kid being called racial slurs at school, how long has he been in school? Three weeks, MAYBE? If he’s only 3 years old now, he certainly wasn’t in school last spring. So, I guess all of Milton’s bad behavior before Labor Day can be attributed to Milton being a dick. All of his bad behavior from then on is because a teacher called his kid a racial slur. Brilliant.
No! No Oliver Perez! (This isnt a rant against you, just a rant against the team as a whole. When i get out of grad school ill start my own website and rant there. until december though, Im lumping it in here) I don’t want shitty could-be’s that cost too damn much! I want players who are cheap and could be good, or guys who fucking ARE good. No more of this Aaron Miles or Kevin Gregg bullshit. For heaven’s sake, I’ll buy Jim Hendry a copy of Baseball Forecaster (Shandler knows what hes doing) myself if it helps him make better decisions. It advised against Gregg before we even bought him! Granted, it said Heilman was going to rebound, but that one’s no one’s fault but Heilman’s.
But Oliver Perez? Seriously, Oliver Perez? He of the sub 4 ERA in only 3 of his 10 years pitching in the majors? He had one good year with the Pirates and one with the Mets. The rest have been shit. Say what you will about Carlos, at least his mediocre efforts can lead to a win, and not 5-6 runs earned.
What this team needs is a fucking life coach. Geovany! Get off your lazy ass, youre a major league catcher now. Alfonso! We ran Sosa out of this fucking town, stop trying to bring his bullshit back! Theriot! Welcome to the big leagues, boy! Big boys dont fucking fade in September every fucking year, and big boys make the plays they need to. Jeff Baker! Glad to see you here, dont Mike Fontenot your chance next year up! Andres Blanco! Work on your hitting so that way we dont need to worry about fucking Theriot fading down the stretch! Derrek and Aramis! You guys have been the go to guys when we needed hitting, time to be the go-to guys in the fucking offseason workouts and leadership roles we need! Jake Fox! Time to show you can hit every day in right Field! Kosuke! No rest for you either, we’re paying you an assload of cash, so work out!
And the pitching! Carlos, for fuck’s sake i’ll come to your house every day and put you to bed when you should, but here’s an idea. You want to lead the damn team, act like a fucking leader! Leaders dont get carpal tunnel from the fucking internet, leaders work out even when they dont want to! Dempster! Next year, let’s show you were worth what we paid you for! Wells! None of this Soto sophomore slump bullshit from you, work out in the offseason and get stronger! Lilly! You make damn sure those bodies are buried and hidden so we dont lose you down the stretch! Harden! Thanks for the draft picks, go sign with the Mets, get out of our hair.
The rest of you chucklefucks, get your heads out of your ass. You are here to play baseball. I can guaran-damn-tee you that if you play your fucking heart out next year and if you win the World Series, not only will we not care about the rest of your career and how poorly you do, you will never need to pay for a dinner or a beer in this town again. So work the hell out this offseason and come back in 2010 hungry as hell.
(BK, sorry for the long ass rant, but i needed to vent somewhere, and as i said, no website yet as i dont have the time)
long story short, no oliver perez.
I only mentioned Oliver Perez because that’s the rumor that’s been floated.
The only way they’re going to be able to trade Milton without eating the rest of his entire contract, though, is to take back a shit contract like Perez. I would love nothing more than to watch fragile little Milton wither under the heat of the New York media.
If the Cubs did indeed trade for Perez, they should seriously consider getting him a life coach. If that guy could stop snorting every powder he sees, he might end up being worth a damn.
I agree with Dolan, though. If you’re resigned to wasting $21M on a guy who is not going to play for you and you can’t trade him, just cut his ass.
I’m not missing it, just not buying it. I know the Daily Herald has a small circulation, but everybody saw Milton’s quotes. Hendry can still make the same argument: not a good fit, and he just got hit with the perfect storm of bad 1st half, tough media, and poor judgment on Milton’s part. The suspension didn’t change anybody’s opinion of the guy.
What it did was get Milton away from the media. We haven’t heard a peep out of Milton–his mom, his t-ball coach, his barber, and his kid’s pre-school superintendent, yes, but not from Milton. As long as that dude was in the clubhouse, he was an angry media outburst waiting to happen, especially if he was benched. Now, Milton can cool off without Paul Sullivan climbing up his jock strap before and after every game. The suspension was a good move, and it just may have saved Bradley’s trade value before he committed a felony.
Maybe Hendry already knew he was on the way out and this was his last “fuck you” to the guy that exemplifies all that Hendry f’d up during the off-season.
Either way, there has never been a better time to blow the whole thing up. See ya later Milton, Lou, Larry, Z, Aaron, etc…
There are VERY few players on this team that are “must keep” players. Hell, I would even get rid of Lee now that his stock his high. Which reminds me, a big congrats to D Lee for really bouncing back and putting up some MVP type numbers this year. If he would have had a decent supporting cast this year, who knows what could have happened.
I fully understand that GMs aren’t retarded. But there is no way a suspension HELPS his trade value, and I highly doubt it was designed just to keep Milton away from the media. I think it was an emotional reaction by Hendry, who is understandably pissed that Milton has made him look like an idiot.
I completely agree. If the Cubs were ever going to “blow it up,” now would be an ideal time, particularly with the turnover of the ownership. Does Ricketts have the balls to piss off the fanbase for a couple of years while they rebuild, though?
Won’t disagree with you about the motivation, regardless of what I think the positives are. Whatever Hendry’s explanation, I don’t think he did it on behalf of the fans or as a tactical move. He did it because Milton finally joined the rest of the planet in insulting him.
I’m actually hoping GMs are retarded, or at least as slow as Hendry was. There has to be a couple who think they can get some production out of him and that he’ll fit in better in a regulation-size clubhouse.
I am not so sure the Cubs fanbase would be that pissed. You got a bunch of under achieving, overpaid players that haven’t produced and haven’t won a playoff game. It isn’t a very likable group of players…or coaches.
Put some young talent out there and the fans will pay to see the next phenomenon and cheer for the underdog. Just look at the way they have gushed over Fuld, Fox, Wells, etc…
If there has ever been a time, it is now.
Now’s as good a time as any to blow it up. I think we’re probably headed for a few years of bad baseball one way or the other. Soriano seems to be headed downhill, and has an albatross of a contract. Zambrano is a headcase. Really, the only players with real trade value would be Lee and Ramirez. I’d trade Lee this off-season, inasmuch as his career-high numbers and his age mean that his value will never be higher. Who will replace him? Who cares; the team is bound to suck either with or without him, and better to trade him now when he has value than in a couple years when you get nothing in return for him. I’d hold onto Ramirez and try to build around him. You’d have to get rid of Lou, too–he didn’t want any part of rebuilding in Tampa Bay, and he wouldn’t want to do it here, either.
The sound you just heard is the Cubs’ window of opportunity slamming shut.
Sadly, I agree on the window of opportunity slamming shut. Too bad they wasted great opportunities to win the whole thing in 2003 and 2004. Even though they were an unlikable bunch of dicks, that 2004 team was pretty stacked.
There may be hope. 7 GMs in 10 years have thought they could handle Bradley.
Easy Money was a board game introduced by Milton Bradley in 1935, and bears similarity to Parker Brothers‘ game Monopoly. Year’s later, a douchebagerous MLB ball player, with a racist/whore mother, would reintroduce this popular game in the form of anal penetration of his team’s GM.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Easy_Money_(board_game)
Ryan Beariot for post of the fucking season!
I for one hope they don’t blow this team completely up. DLee is still solid, Aramis had a freak injury, and despite Big Z’s overall nuttiness, I think it would be a huge mistake to trade him. Get rid of Bradley, Miles and Gregg let Harden walk, keep Soto away from the Mexican agriculture and ho-hos, and pray Randy Wells doesn’t room with Geo in Spring Training. Get a real 2nd baseman-Figgins, preferably, but if not him then Hudson or Polanco, but the latter two shouldn’t be signed for any more than two years. Give Jeff Baker a chance to win a bench job as your super utility guy. Move Fuky back to RF and find a CF in the minors or find a way to snag Mike Cameron for a year. Hopefully Soriano’s knee injury is behind him and he can produce like he did in ’07/’08 or at least come close. Resign Grabow and push Heilman off a cliff.
I understand why some people want to trade Zambrano, but I think realistically, that we’d never get anything back as good as he’s capable of pitching. There aren’t any free agent pitchers as good as what Z can give us and the Cubs can’t afford any of them anyway. I really think what needs to happen is Lou needs to talk to Z and get a recommitment of focus. If we had a real pitching coach, it would have been done already. While I’m at it, push Rothschild off that same cliff where we dumped Heilman and find a way to sweet talk Dave Duncan into coming over here. If Duncan can turn Pinero and Wellemeyer into servicable pitchers, he could turn Carlos into Fernando Venuezula.
I say we suspend Cubs baseball for a period of two years. Trade away any talent we have at the AAA and above level for money (to pay current salaries we can’t dump) and a shitload of prospects. Use the next two years to stock the farm team. Also tear down that shithole park and build a new one during this time period. Come 2012 we’ll have a new park, a young team, low payroll; the chads and trixies will have found something else to do with their summer afternoons so they’ll be gone…basically the Cubs will be set for the future for the first time in my life.
i know, i just dont understand why we should trade for a guy who makes jason marquis look like a better option. ugh, oliver perez. pretty much, ugh, the mets. Say what you will about us and our age and contracts, i’m just glad that we a) dont have to pay for a new stadium thats already broken down and b) players that are roughly the same age as ours, only coming off of massive crippling season ending injuries, (ESPECIALLY the players who are speed based getting leg injuries) c) no depth at pitching past santana d) in a ballpark thats based around the brooklyn dodgers and makes petco look small.
good luck to that team, and in that division. and what about, say, luis castillo or…..(checks mets roster) wow, there is NOTHING on there worth trading for (that they would trade of course.)
can we convince riccardi to take the contract? his past mistakes seem to indicate its possible…
Have you seen if anyone has done any follow-up on the teacher accusations? It’s one thing to point to a bunch of drunken assholes in the stands and saying, “some of those people over there said racist things to me,” it’s totally fucking serious when you say that a specific person in the educational system has called a three-year old the n-word.
I haven’t seen anything yet. Interestingly enough, Grow Stubs Grow was telling me that Bradley’s mom was on the Loop yesterday morning doing an interview with Johnny B. Apparently, Milton called her right after the interview was over and told her not to do any more interviews. I suspect someone told him that he should put a gag order on his mom before she slanders another teacher.
The Cubs could also have him come back next year, he’ll rake, and everything will be right in the world.
Good God! How much do you have to shoot off your mouth to get Milton Bradley to tell you to cool it?
OPS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
OPS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!