“Sorry, Shane”? Where’s MY F@#$ing Apology?


Aw, did you get beer in your eyes?  Because I just gouged mine out.Well, that was awful nice of Lou Piniella to apologize to Shane Victorino. Poor Shane was the victim of a drunken idiot in the bleachers who decided to douse him with a nearly full cup of beer. Incidentally, I apologize to Section 242 and flannj. So help me God, I thought Victorino dropped the ball and the umps called fan interference. I mistook the cup in this video as the ball hitting the ground. If Victorino HAD dropped the ball, I can only assume it would have been fan interference. Not that Cubs fans should know when fan interference should and should not be called. Asshole. No matter. After the game, Lou gave a heartfelt apology to Victorino. When he was done, I looked at Lou with raised eyebrows and said, “Annnnd?”

Where’s MY fucking apology, Lou?

I paid $72 to sit with J-Kerm through that whole disaster of a game. Where’s my apology? Where’s my refund?

Where’s my apology for you sending Jeff Samardzija to the lions by giving him his first MLB start against the predominantly left-handed-hitting defending world champions? I know SeanBearPig was shit last night, too, but why in the world wouldn’t you start the more experienced Marshall against a team that boasts two switch-hitters followed by three left-handed hitters as the top five in its lineup?

Where’s my apology for your stubborn insistence on putting Ryan Theriot at the top of the lineup, when Kosuke Fukudome has a .439 OBP in the leadoff position, 80 points higher than Theriot’s .359 (not including last night’s stats)? You know what, Lou? Keep him the hell out of the two spot, too. Milton Bradley has a .542 OBP up there, more than 100 200 points higher than Theriot’s .337.

Why can’t you figure out that Carlos Marmol is an absolute disaster right now, and that Angel Guzman IS your new setup man? Apologize for that, Lou.

Where’s my apology for you using Aaron Miles for anything but target practice?

Or how about my apology for having to watch what I suspect was the shortest on-field team in Major League Baseball history. At one point last night, the Cubs had 5’10″ Sam Fuld in the outfield, and 5’8″ Mike Fontenot, 5’11″ Ryan Theriot, and 5’8″ Miles around the infield. The Cubs would have been in good shape, assuming the Phillies were unable to hit the ball higher than about seven feet in the air.

How about apologizing for the four-game losing streak your team is currently on? Or the 3-7 record you’ve scraped together in your last 10 games? Or the four games you’ve now dropped below a pretty mediocre Cardinals team?

Victorino’s problems can be solved with a fucking towel as he laughs all the way to the playoffs. How about solving some of MY problems, Lou?

By the way, well done, Cubs. You sure showed me.

  • Thank you

    I couldn’t figure out why everyone was giving Lou a pass this season. He has seemed tired, overwhelmed and disinterested at various points this year. I know he wasn’t perfect when he took the job (Seattle fans still abhor his handling of pitching staffs) but what I didn’t expect was placating to spoiled brats about their spot in the lineup, desperate offensive play calling and an inexcusable commitment to organizing the lineup based that archaic lefty-righty strategy instead of talent.

  • flannj

    “OKAY, NOW THAT WAS THE WORST GAME OF THE SEASON, RIGHT?”
    Kerm, I think you can just keep reusing your title from yesterday.

  • original al

    Well Kerm if it makes you feel better going to the game today and I’m expecting much O against Cliff Lee. Probably not going to be pretty

  • flannj

    Aaannd, I should have clicked on your link before I typed that.

  • Irish Yeti

    You can actually go on a limb and say Bradley’s 2-hole OBP is 200 points higher than Theriot’s

  • jesus christ, what an idiot

    if you think ryan theriot’s 5-11, i’ve got a major league team to sell you for $900 million.

  • Section 242

    No apology necessary. I am so used to you getting things wrong that I just ignore it.

  • http://hirejimessian.com Bad Kermit

    @Irish Yeti – Oops. Thanks. I was typing this with a lot of angry still angried up in my blood.

  • CactusMcHarris

    Sorry, I disagree – if the drunken assholes there can’t be controlled when their team is being blown out, at least Lou has the class to apologize to him – the stadium management should do the same. There’s no call for pissed-off-that-our-Cubs-suck-when-they-shouldn’t ‘fans’ are allowed anywhere near beer and the playing field.

  • http://hirejimessian.com Bad Kermit

    @CactusMcHarris – Did you actually read the post? Nowhere did I suggest that Lou shouldn’t have apologized to Victorino.

  • http://diaryofamadcubsfan.blogspot.com BigFlax

    I was at the game too. First in-person loss at Wrigley since May 1, 2001 – a game which, coincidentally, was also an ugly blowout featuring a big crooked number in an early inning. Jason Bere was the starter, which tells you how long ago that was.

  • http://hirejimessian.com Bad Kermit

    @BigFlax – About 8 years ago, I’d estimate.

  • psychoch

    Oh, how they suck.

  • http://facebook.com/wsuraiders33 Charles

    AMEN

  • StPatrick

    I wish the Cubs would at least suck 100%. The bad years are much easier when they’re out of it by June. This whole “we have tons of potential…and we’ll live up to it 30-40% of the time” thing they keep doing lately requires a lot more attention and causes way more ANGRY.

  • PenFoe

    Originally Posted By Bad Kermit@BigFlax – About 8 years ago, I’d estimate.

    Look at the fancy mathematician with his fancy blog.
    I’ll have you know that Flax lost 3 of his fingers in a tragic Bubble Hockey accident and he can’t count to 8 anymore.

    Asshole.

  • original al

    Originally Posted By original alWell Kerm if it makes you feel better going to the game today and I’m expecting much O against Cliff Lee. Probably not going to be pretty

    For once I was right, Not a whole lot of good going on.

  • Tom Trebelhorn

    So here are the questions…does the new owner (assuming it ever gets done) clean house and get rid of Hendry and Lou? Does Lou see the writing on the wall (as well as the game passing him by) and retire? Is Lou Piniella the manager of this team next year?

  • CactusMcHarris

    @Bad Kermit – I did read it, and my indignation should have taken a back seat to your righteous anger at so many bad things happening at this particular point in time. In an alternative universe, you know Lou’s gang is leading the division by 20 games and he’s making no managerial mistakes.