Welcome Back, Derrek Lee
Now that Derrek Lee is no longer hitting third in the lineup, he’s finally hitting like a guy who should be hitting third in the lineup. He’s put up a .378/.440/.756 line in the past two weeks with 5 HR and 13 RBIs. His hitting streak is up to 18 games. He’s already reached more than half of his home run total from the 2008 season. No one on this team is capable of replacing the production lost with Aramis Ramirez out of the lineup, but Lee has sure as hell been trying lately.
We missed you, Derrek.
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I was at the game on Friday when Lee cracked 2 homers, and I thought I was back in 2005. He looks like a completely different person. Maybe that slipped disk in his neck is finally better. Whatever it is…it’s a huge relief.
Maybe you shouldn’t talk about me like I’m not here. You could just ask me if I’m better.
And even though you didn’t bother to ask, I’m doing fine I guess. Although my wife disk seems to think it’s fine to spend $300 on shoes, then complain when I buy a nice bottle of scotch for one sixth that amount. I guarantee I will still have some left in the bottle by the time she boxes them back up and they disappear into the back of the closet forever. It’s not like I spend all day in the spine working so she can afford nice things and drink martinis all day with her vapid friends. Oh wait, it is like that. God forbid a hardworking disk has a nice tall drink waiting for him when he gets home.
Bitch.
But other than that, doing pretty well.
So this is where you spend your free time? Gallivanting about the comments section in some sports blog with a bunch of strange men? Criticizing me? I do EVERYTHING for you. I cook you dinner, I clean your fucking laundry, I take care of the kid disks ALL DAY, and I still find the energy at the end of the day to lay there while you feebly attempt to satisfy me, Is it so hard to believe that *I* might want a little luxury now and then? Maybe I want to be spoiled once in a while? Lord knows you’d never buy anything nice for me, anyhow–you forgot my birthday AND you forgot our anniversary this year. Big shock. BIG shock there. I even stood by you when you were banging that Coccyx down there on the lower spine! You know what? I’ve had enough of this, and I’ve had enough of you. I want to SEPARATE, and I don’t care how it misaligns the neck!
Wow, I feel really bad for that disk. No one needs to live with that kind of wife.
No wonder D. Lee was having such a hard time with the bat.
If mommy and daddy divorce, does it mean me and L5 have to split time between the lumbar region and daddy’s apartment in the thoracic region?
Hey guys, I’m back. Was in Shanghai for the past couple of months, and let me tell you I did some craaaaazy shit over there! You haven’t lived until you’ve done blow off the ass of a 18 year old Chinese whore. Anyways, what’d I miss?
Jesus Christ, could you two stop fighting? It’s killing me up here!
Man, you have a nice run for a post or two, and then – BAM! – you’re left in a heap by the side of the road, moaning in a pool of your own blood. Thanks a lot, guys. Thanks a LOT.
Derrek didnt hit a game tying HR today. Doom? Dooooooooooooooooooooooom!
and where’s the damn podcast?