Aren’t Cubs fans aware of how the rest of the world perceives them? Am I the only one who notices that, thanks to the actions of a select few, Cubs fans are seen primarily as lobotomized simps? It’s sad, because we’re really not all that bad. Most of the Cubs fans I know are intelligent, realistic, and funny. So, why are the Cubs fans like this generally the most vocal?
Let me sum up the concept behind the site. The guy who started the site knows the guy up in the corner, who apparently provided the markers used to create the Shawon-O-Meter, which proudly displayed Dunston’s robust .278 average. The guy has started an online campaign (including an online petition, which ALWAYS gets results) to get Stephen Colbert’s doppleganger to sing the Seventh Inning Stretch at Wrigley Field.
Why? Because he’s a “big Cubs fan.” Good for him. We’re all big Cubs fans. If you’re reading this site, you’re a big Cubs fan. Or you ADORE dick jokes. It absolutely drives me nuts when someone declares himself or herself the “biggest Cubs fan” in the world. Or claim that they’re a “better” Cubs fan than you are. Bullshit. Mike D. has an encyclopedic memory of every Cubs game since about 1982. Dolan has blogged about the Cubs almost every day for ten years. Are they better than everyone else? Well, yes. But other than them, the rest of us are all just Cubs fans.
So, that’s why it pisses me off when someone thinks they deserve to sing the Stretch over anyone else. They don’t. The guy who had an idea to keep track of the batting average of a mediocre shortstop (that’s what scoreboards are for) doesn’t deserve to sing the Stretch any more than you or I do. He does, however, deserve to sing it more than Jim Belushi. But that’s another story.
What is more ridiculous is the fact that THE CUBS HAVE ALREADY ESTABLISHED A SYSTEM FOR THE “COMMON” FAN TO SING THE GODDAMN STRETCH! Remember Dustin Eglseder? The Cubs already had this idea, and already put it into place. The guy acknowledges the competition, mentions that his buddy was in the top fifty, and then demands a special exemption for him. Screw that. If this dude’s buddy wants to sing the Stretch, enter the damn competition again this year. Maybe he should work on singing better. Or being more interesting. Or pretending he actually is Stephen Colbert.
But for God’s sake, keep it off the internet. These guys are wasting space that could be filled with videos of kids getting hit in the head with basketballs, or something.
Thanks to Pre for pointing out the site.
We already know who the biggest Cub fan is. He’s some guy who sits on the same barstool day after day, with a liver the consistency of granite, looking up at the TV, muttering, “fuckin’ Cubs.”
And why give this guy linkable pub? Your hits have probably gone up a lot in the past week. Let him whither away and die.
I swear I’ve seen that picture next to an article in The Onion.
Also, I’M the world’s best Cubs fan, according to my t-shirt.
Ahem… CT? My tea mug begs to differ.
HEY! My ball sac tattoo trumps all of you!
@Irish Yeti –
It looks better up close.
What’s next? The white-haired lady who sits above the dugout that is always captured during the 7th Inning Stretch? How about “Moon” Mullins, the hapless loser who camps outside the park and collects the balls that are hit out?
What a jamoke.
@Fork – Because some of the comments over there are pretty hilarious.
Are there any good ones that aren’t from us?
I like how the guy in the blog posted on Jan. 4 posts:
“A confluence of activity goes into the Wrigley Field experience. What happens on the field is certainly a big part of it: Milt Pappas’ near-perfect game, Kerry Wood’s 20 strikeouts, Reed Johnson’s diving, hat-flipping catch, Willie Smith’s Opening Day walk-off home run, the Michael Barrett-A.J. Pierzynski brawl. But what happens in the stands, in the bars surrounding the park, around the souvenir stands, all along Waveland and Sheffield and Addison and Clark, on the el platform, under the stadium in the concession area, and yes, in the broadcast booth…that’s as much a part of it.’”
If he’s such a “Big Cubs Fan” Wouldn’t he know that Reed Johnson’s hat-flipping catch was in Washington D.C. and not at Wrigley. He caught the ball and slid into the wall head first, if he did that at Wrigley, Johnson would still be laying there from the massive concussion that would occur. What idiots, its guys like these that give Cub Fans like us a bad name.
But what happens in the stands, in the bars surrounding the park, around the souvenir stands, all along Waveland and Sheffield and Addison and Clark, on the el platform, under the stadium in the concession area, and yes, in the broadcast booth…that’s as much a part of it.’”
Ninety five percent of what goes on at the aforementioned places (aside from the booth, because they’re not drunk there): Stupid, drunk morons blathering on about how “awesome” Wrigley is and basically scaring/annoying the bejeesus out of normal fans. Also most of these people are standing around. Nothing’s fun about standing in line for the El or the 1920′s concession setup.
@jesus christ, what an idiot – Speaking of drunk idiots how about this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dCfmI7gGEwY
Yeah I love this about Wrigley Field, this is my favorite part of the whole “Wrigley Experience” This makes me proud to myself a Cubs fan.
Don’t get me wrong I love the Cubs, I just hate the “Fans” that can’t get a grip on reality, the ones who think everything little thing is unique to Wrigley and that everything player that plays with “heart” shouldn’t be traded or should be starting everyday (i.e Ryan Theriot). I also hate the ones who think they have the inside scoop and think the team belongs to them personally (i.e. Al Yellon), honestly does the record of the Cubs record by PA announcer really matter and no one cares what the Cubs record is when Al attends the games.
There are only 3 Cub fan sites I visit everyday, here, Desipio and Wrigleyville23. I read Chuckie Hacks (Brewers) more then I dare go to BCB, god I hate Al.
harry potter did not age well.
…..I’m just here for the dick jokes…….
Same goes for the Barrett/Pierzynski fight.
Dude, seriously? Can you tell which bathroom in Wrigley Field has windows along the top?
Correct answer of course is “none of them”.
That ain’t Wrigley, holmes.
Never paid attention to the windows or lack of…
My bad, Looks like the walls are wooden too, so definately not wrigley, but it still wouldn’t surprise me though. Too many dumbasses like this roaming the earth, wasting all of our oxygen, I say we take them out back and beat them.
I’m also here for the dick jokes – I didn’t even realize this blog was about baseball, let alone the Cubs.
This man is stealing attention from Andre The Hawk Dawson.
That’s blasphemy in itself.
Maybe someone can take Harry Potter’s broom and shove it up his ase.
Now you’re speaking my language, sir.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HozY8A3_Yro
To this day, I can’t get enough of that.
@Thrillho – That’s the exact one I was referencing. The reaction of the crowd is the delicious icing on the cake.