Bleeding Jimmy “Skip” Essian here, checking in today on Bleeding Jimmy Essian Day. Any day that invokes my name is a great day, although it’s unfortunate that this day came because of a guy more suited to be dictator of a Third World Nation. No matter.
Let’s talk about bleeding and Jimmy Essian. There are things that bleed that I like. For example:
Oh, and also this:
Anyone know where I can find similar action in person? Especially on New Year’s Day? Especially similar action at the place where I once worked? E-mail Bad Kermit, and I’ll be eternally in your debt.
As great as it would be to talk about that, we’re not at some great hockey site. This isn’t even a hockey site. If I wanted a great hockey site, and really a hockey site that contains all my needs, I’d go to this awesome hockey site.
Let’s instead focus on baseball and the issue at hand. We’re hearing reports of this out-of-control fuhrer of the left field bleachers banning people that disagree with him and eliminating conversations.
That got me thinking. What if I could eliminate and banish all the bad memories of 1991? I just did, banishing all the disagreeable plays and games of the Cubs after I took the reins on May 22, 1991. Take a look at the new and improved Game Log.
| Gm | Date | Opp | Score | W-L | GB | Time | Winner | Loser | Attend | |
| 39 | Wed, May 22 | @NYM | W | 5-2 | 19-20 | 5 | 2:36 | G Maddux | F Viola | 28,749 |
| 40 | Thu, May 23 | @NYM | W | 4-3 | 20-20 | 4 | 3:15 | L Lancaster | J Franco | 29,763 |
| 41 | Fri, May 24 | MON | W | 4-3 | 21-20 | 4 | 2:28 | B Scanlan | M Gardner | 32,410 |
| 42 | Sat, May 25 | MON | W | 6-1 | 22-20 | 4 | 2:32 | M Bielecki | R Mahler | 16,961 |
| 43 | Sun, May 26 | MON | W | 8-6 | 23-20 | 4 | 3:21 | L Lancaster | T Burke | 35,417 |
| 44 | Mon, May 27 | NYM | cancelled | 23-20 | 4.5 | |||||
| 45 | Tue, May 28 | NYM | W | 9-8 | 24-20 | 3.5 | 3:30 | P Assenmache | J Franco | 32,811 |
| 46 | Wed, May 29 | NYM | cancelled | 24-20 | ||||||
| 47 | Fri, May 31 | @MON | W | 7-2 | 25-20 | 3 | 3:05 | M Bielecki | D Martinez | 17,308 |
| 48 | Sat, Jun 1 | @MON | W | 2-1 (10) | 26-20 | 3 | 3:07 | C McElroy | B Jones | 22,184 |
| 49 | Sun, Jun 2 | @MON | W | 4-3 | 27-20 | 3 | 2:59 | P Assenmache | S Ruskin | 23,070 |
| 50 | Tue, Jun 4 | SDP | cancelled | 27-20 | 2.5 | |||||
| 51 | Wed, Jun 5 | SDP | cancelled | 27-20 | 2 | |||||
| 52 | Thu, Jun 6 | SDP | W | 6-2 | 28-20 | 2 | 2:41 | G Maddux | J Melendez | 23,200 |
| 53 | Fri, Jun 7 | LAD | W | 1-0 | 29-20 | 1 | 2:46 | S Boskie | M Morgan | 35,414 |
| 54 | Sat, Jun 8 | LAD | W | 4-3 | 30-20 | 1 | 2:46 | C McElroy | K Gross | 35,101 |
| 55 | Sun, Jun 9 | LAD | cancelled | 30-20 | 0.5 | |||||
| 56 | Mon, Jun 10 | LAD | cancelled | 30-20 | 0 | |||||
| 57 | Tue, Jun 11 | SFG | W | 6-5 | 31-20 | up 1.0 | 3:15 | P Assenmache | B Black | 32,449 |
| 58 | Wed, Jun 12 | SFG | W | 6-1 | 32-20 | up 1.0 | 2:51 | S Boskie | D Robinson | 33,880 |
| 59 | Thu, Jun 13 | SFG | W | 4-3 | 33-20 | up 1.0 | 2:37 | M Bielecki | T Wilson | 34,149 |
| 60 | Fri, Jun 14 | @SDP | W | 7-3 | 34-20 | up 1.0 | 3:19 | D Jackson | A Benes | 30,161 |
| 61 | Sat, Jun 15 | @SDP | cancelled | 34-20 | up 1.5 | |||||
| 62 | Sun, Jun 16 | @SDP | W | 2-1 | 35-20 | up 2.5 | 2:28 | G Maddux | J Melendez | 28,961 |
| 63 | Mon, Jun 17 | @LAD | cancelled | 35-20 | up 3.0 | |||||
| 64 | Tue, Jun 18 | @LAD | W | 4-3 (11) | 36-20 | up 4.0 | 4:01 | D Smith | J Gott | 37,402 |
| 65 | Wed, Jun 19 | @LAD | W | 8-7 | 37-20 | up 5.0 | 3:41 | C McElroy | J Candelaria | 39,287 |
| 66 | Thu, Jun 20 | @SFG | cancelled | 37-20 | up 5.5 | |||||
| 67 | Fri, Jun 21 | @SFG | cancelled | 37-20 | up 6.0 | |||||
| 68 | Sat, Jun 22 | @SFG | cancelled | 37-20 | up 6.5 | |||||
| 69 | Sun, Jun 23 | @SFG | W | 1-0 | 38-20 | up 7.5 | 2:15 | B Scanlan | J Burkett | 42,389 |
| 70 | Tue, Jun 25 | @PIT | W | 5-1 | 39-20 | up 7.5 | 2:25 | L Lancaster | J Smiley | 31,115 |
| 71 | Wed, Jun 26 | @PIT | cancelled | 39-20 | up 8.0 | |||||
| 72 | Thu, Jun 27 | @PIT | W | 3-0 | 40-20 | up 9.0 | 2:55 | F Castillo | D Drabek | 30,960 |
| 73 | Fri, Jun 28 | STL | cancelled | 40-20 | up 9.5 | |||||
| 74 | Sat, Jun 29 | STL | W | 6-4 | 41-20 | up 9.5 | 2:54 | L Lancaster | B Tewksbury | 34,957 |
| 75 | Sun, Jun 30 | STL | W | 7-4 | 42-20 | up 9.5 | 2:30 | C McElroy | J DeLeon | 32,736 |
| 76 | Mon, Jul 1 | PIT | W | 6-5 (13) | 43-20 | up 9.5 | 4:35 | B Scanlan | S Belinda | 32,633 |
| 77 | Tue, Jul 2 | PIT | cancelled | 43-20 | up 10.0 | |||||
| 78 | Wed, Jul 3 | PIT | cancelled | 43-20 | up 10.5 | |||||
| 79 | Thu, Jul 4 | PIT | W | 9-8 (11) | 44-20 | up 10.5 | 3:32 | C McElroy | B Landrum | 31,098 |
| 80 | Fri, Jul 5 | @STL | W | 5-1 | 45-20 | up 10.5 | 2:53 | F Castillo | J DeLeon | 49,251 |
| 81 | Sat, Jul 6 | @STL | W | 12-2 | 46-20 | up 10.5 | 2:58 | M Bielecki | B Smith | 48,313 |
| 82 | Sun, Jul 7 | @STL | W | 6-5 | 47-20 | up 11.5 | 2:59 | L Lancaster | K Hill | 39,595 |
| 83 | Thu, Jul 11 | HOU | W | 5-4 (11) | 48-20 | up 12.5 | 3:18 | D Smith | M Capel | 32,313 |
| 84 | Fri, Jul 12 | HOU | W | 5-2 | 49-20 | up 12.5 | 2:27 | F Castillo | M Portugal | 33,772 |
| 85 | Sat, Jul 13 | HOU | W | 4-3 | 50-20 | up 12.5 | 2:45 | L Lancaster | M Capel | 32,588 |
| 86 | Sun, Jul 14 | HOU | W | 4-3 | 51-20 | up 12.5 | 3:00 | M Bielecki | D Kile | 33,750 |
| 87 | Mon, Jul 15 | @ATL | W | 6-4 | 52-20 | up 12.5 | 3:15 | G Maddux | P Smith | 25,057 |
| 88 | Tue, Jul 16 | @ATL | cancelled | 52-20 | up 13.0 | |||||
| 89 | Wed, Jul 17 | @ATL | cancelled | 52-20 | up 13.5 | |||||
| 90 | Fri, Jul 19 | @HOU | cancelled | 52-20 | up 14.0 | |||||
| 91 | Sat, Jul 20 | @HOU | W | 6-0 | 53-20 | up 14.0 | 2:31 | G Maddux | D Kile | 37,970 |
| 92 | Sun, Jul 21 | @HOU | W | 4-2 | 54-20 | up 14.0 | 2:28 | F Castillo | J Clancy | 28,847 |
| 93 | Tue, Jul 23 | CIN | W | 8-5 | 55-20 | up 14.0 | 3:14 | L Lancaster | R Myers | 34,458 |
| 94 | Wed, Jul 24 | CIN | cancelled | 55-20 | up 14.5 | |||||
| 95 | Thu, Jul 25 | CIN | W | 5-4 (13) | 56-20 | up 14.5 | 4:00 | H Slocumb | T Layana | 35,008 |
| 96 | Fri, Jul 26 | ATL | cancelled | 56-20 | up 15.0 | |||||
| 97 | Sat, Jul 27 | ATL | W | 7-5 | 57-20 | up 15.0 | 2:44 | L Lancaster | J Smoltz | 34,023 |
| 98 | Sun, Jul 28 | ATL | W | 6-2 | 58-20 | up 15.0 | 2:43 | M Bielecki | C Leibrandt | 33,782 |
| 99 | Tue, Jul 30 | @CIN | W | 5-4 (10) | 59-20 | up 16.0 | 3:04 | C McElroy | R Dibble | 37,832 |
| 100 | Wed, Jul 31 | @CIN | cancelled | 59-20 | up 16.5 | |||||
| 101 | Fri, Aug 2 | @NYM | W | 4-2 (10) | 60-20 | up 16.5 | 3:30 | P Assenmache | A Pena | 35,361 |
| 102 | Sat, Aug 3 | @NYM | W | 9-2 | 61-20 | up 16.5 | 2:54 | B Scanlan | F Viola | 39,804 |
| 103 | Sun, Aug 4 | @NYM | W | 8-3 | 62-20 | up 16.5 | 2:54 | G Maddux | D Cone | 36,080 |
| 104 | Mon, Aug 5 | @NYM | W | 7-2 | 62-20 | up 16.5 | 2:31 | F Castillo | P Schourek | 27,508 |
| 105 | Tue, Aug 6 | @PHI | W | 2-1 | 63-20 | up 17.5 | 2:50 | C McElroy | J Boever | 26,562 |
| 106 | Wed, Aug 7 | @PHI | cancelled | 63-20 | up 18.0 | |||||
| 107 | Thu, Aug 8 | @PHI | cancelled | 63-20 | up 18.5 | |||||
| 108 | Fri, Aug 9 | NYM | W | 5-4 | 64-20 | up 18.5 | 2:33 | G Maddux | D Cone | 36,110 |
| 109 | Sat, Aug 10 | NYM | W | 6-2 | 65-20 | up 18.5 | 2:49 | B Scanlan | T Burke | 35,639 |
| 110 | Sun, Aug 11 | NYM | W | 3-2 (14) | 66-20 | up 18.5 | 4:10 | S Boskie | P Schourek | 33,128 |
| 111 | Mon, Aug 12 | NYM | W | 3-2 (10) | 67-20 | up 18.5 | 2:53 | L Lancaster | T Burke | 34,342 |
| 112 | Tue, Aug 13 | MON | W | 6-4 | 68-20 | up 19.5 | 2:40 | D Jackson | M Gardner | 34,085 |
| 113 | Wed, Aug 14 | MON | cancelled | 68-20 | up 20.0 | |||||
| 114 | Thu, Aug 15 | MON | W | 7-6 | 69-20 | up 20.0 | 3:11 | P Assenmache | J Fassero | 33,514 |
| 115 | Fri, Aug 16 | PHI | W | 9-1 | 70-20 | up 20.0 | 2:31 | R Sutcliffe | B Ruffin | 34,547 |
| 116 | Sat, Aug 17 | PHI | cancelled | 70-20 | up 20.5 | |||||
| 117 | Sun, Aug 18 | PHI | W | 7-6 (10) | 71-20 | up 20.5 | 3:06 | P Assenmache | M Williams | 32,801 |
| 118 | Mon, Aug 19 | @MON | W | 3-2 (11) | 72-20 | up 20.5 | 3:21 | P Assenmache | B Sampen | 10,792 |
| 119 | Tue, Aug 20 | @MON | cancelled | 72-20 | up 21.0 | |||||
| 120 | Wed, Aug 21 | @MON | W | 3-1 | 73-20 | up 21.0 | 2:47 | R Sutcliffe | C Nabholz | 15,192 |
| 121 | Fri, Aug 23 | SDP | W | 5-4 | 74-20 | up 21.0 | 2:28 | L Lancaster | C Lefferts | 33,090 |
| 122 | Sat, Aug 24 | SDP | cancelled | 74-20 | up 21.5 | |||||
| 123 | Sun, Aug 25 | SDP | W | 9-6 | 75-20 | up 22.5 | 3:14 | S Boskie | M Maddux | 31,190 |
| 124 | Mon, Aug 26 | LAD | W | 3-0 | 76-20 | up 23.5 | 3:06 | R Sutcliffe | O Hershiser | 31,149 |
| 125 | Tue, Aug 27 | LAD | W | 2-1 | 77-20 | up 23.5 | 2:25 | F Castillo | R Martinez | 31,624 |
| 126 | Wed, Aug 28 | @SFG | W | 8-6 | 78-20 | up 23.5 | 3:27 | M Bielecki | P McClellan | 16,230 |
| 127 | Thu, Aug 29 | @SFG | W | 5-4 | 79-20 | up 23.5 | 2:44 | G Maddux | F Oliveras | 19,887 |
| 128 | Fri, Aug 30 | @LAD | cancelled | 79-20 | up 24.0 | |||||
| 129 | Sat, Aug 31 | @LAD | cancelled | 79-20 | up 24.5 | |||||
| 130 | Sun, Sep 1 | @LAD | cancelled | 79-20 | up 25.0 | |||||
| 131 | Mon, Sep 2 | @SDP | W | 10-8 | 80-20 | up 25.0 | 3:21 | C McElroy | J Melendez | 12,706 |
| 132 | Tue, Sep 3 | @SDP | cancelled | 80-20 | up 25.5 | |||||
| 133 | Wed, Sep 4 | @SDP | cancelled | 80-20 | up 26.0 | |||||
| 134 | Fri, Sep 6 | SFG | W | 3-2 | 81-20 | up 26.0 | 2:47 | F Castillo | B Hickerson | 22,090 |
| 135 | Sat, Sep 7 | SFG | W | 2-1 | 82-20 | up 26.0 | 2:10 | M Bielecki | P McClellan | 30,821 |
| 136 | Sun, Sep 8 | SFG | W | 3-0 | 83-20 | up 27.0 | 3:02 | G Maddux | T Wilson | 27,875 |
| 137 | Mon, Sep 9 | PIT | W | 10-8 | 84-20 | up 28.0 | 3:11 | S Boskie | S Belinda | 18,775 |
| 138 | Tue, Sep 10 | PIT | W | 6-2 | 85-20 | up 28.0 | 3:02 | R Sutcliffe | R Tomlin | 29,299 |
| 139 | Wed, Sep 11 | NYM | cancelled | 85-20 | up 28.5 | |||||
| 140 | Thu, Sep 12 | NYM | cancelled | 85-20 | up 29.0 | |||||
| 141 | Fri, Sep 13 | MON | cancelled | 85-20 | up 29.5 | |||||
| 142 | Sat, Sep 14 | MON | W | 7-5 (10) | 86-20 | up 29.5 | 3:08 | B Scanlan | B Jones | 30,130 |
| 143 | Sun, Sep 15 | MON | W | 5-4 | 87-20 | up 30.5 | 2:45 | R Sutcliffe | M Gardner | 25,601 |
| 144 | Mon, Sep 16 | @PIT | W | 4-3 | 88-20 | up 31.5 | 2:28 | F Castillo | Z Smith | 16,149 |
| 145 | Tue, Sep 17 | @PIT | cancelled | 88-20 | up 32.0 | |||||
| 146 | Wed, Sep 18 | @NYM | W | 4-1 | 89-20 | up 32.0 | 2:15 | G Maddux | F Viola | 11,980 |
| 147 | Sun, Sep 22 | MON | cancelled | 89-20 | up 32.5 | |||||
| 148 | MON | W | 3-1 | 90-20 | up 33.5 | 2:37 | F Castillo | B Sampen | 16,061 | |
| 149 | Mon, Sep 23 | PHI | W | 10-3 | 91-20 | up 33.5 | 2:29 | G Maddux | T Mulholland | 16,141 |
| 150 | Tue, Sep 24 | PHI | cancelled | 91-20 | up 34.0 | |||||
| 151 | Wed, Sep 25 | PHI | W | 4-1 | 92-20 | up 35.0 | 2:42 | S Boskie | T Greene | 9,892 |
| 152 | Fri, Sep 27 | @STL | W | 4-3 | 93-20 | up 36.0 | 2:37 | F Castillo | B Tewksbury | 30,429 |
| 153 | Sat, Sep 28 | @STL | cancelled | 93-20 | up 36.5 | |||||
| 154 | Sun, Sep 29 | @STL | W | 5-3 | 94-20 | up 36.5 | 3:18 | R Sutcliffe | B Smith | 42,665 |
| 155 | Mon, Sep 30 | @PHI | W | 5-3 | 95-20 | up 37.5 | 3:27 | L Lancaster | M Williams | 12,109 |
| 156 | Tue, Oct 1 | @PHI | W | 5-4 | 96-20 | up 38.5 | 2:40 | F Castillo | T Greene | 12,291 |
| 157 | Wed, Oct 2 | @PHI | W | 1-0 | 97-20 | up 38.5 | 2:02 | G Maddux | J DeJesus | 13,680 |
| 158 | Sat, Oct 5 | STL | W | 3-2 | 98-20 | up 38.5 | 2:25 | B Scanlan | W Fraser | 0 |
| 159 | STL | W | 7-5 | 99-20 | up 38.5 | 2:50 | Y Perez | J Agosto | 21,295 | |
| 160 | Sun, Oct 6 | STL | W | 7-3 | 100-20 | up 38.5 | 2:04 | G Maddux | O Olivares | 17,169 |
As you can see, after my Yellon-esque banishment of certain plays and games, we’d finish 100-20, 38 and a half games in first place in the National League East. The 42 cancelled games would not be made up, and we’d go into the National League Championship Series facing the Braves, a fluke of a team that won their division after a last place 1990.
We would destroy them. And then, my sources tell me that we’d knock around the Minnesota Twins, whose fans would be distracted by the start of hockey season anyway.
Oh, and thanks to my revisionist history, I stayed on as Cubs manager, and went 162-0 in 1992 and 1993, 113-0 in 1994 and 144-0 in 1995.
Hmm, on second thought, I think I like this Yellon character.
No, I don’t.
OK, Happy Bleeding Jimmy Essian Day. And get off your butts and get me two Winter Classic tickets for Christmas!


