Remember that day the Brewers had a better similar rotation to ours? I bet that was a fun 24 hours in Wisconsin, unlike every other 24-hour period that has ever occurred in Wisconsin. Anyhow, here’s your Roundup:
- This Orlando Cabrera character really seems like a heck of a good teammate.
- I like the idea that Jim Bowden is listening to Cristian Guzman offers. What are the offers? “Hey, Jim! You want me to shoot Cristian Guzman for you?”
- Lucky for Gaudin, he’s already learned to know and fear my death stare.
- Hard-on is excited to be here, and we’re excited to have him.
- Mariotti inexplicably decides to attempt to create a controversy between Harden and Zambrano.
- Jason Dubois hit three home runs. No, not in a season. In a game. Seriously.
- Yo, Tony! Now that Mulder’s career is over, you want Marquis back?
- None of you mortals can possibly be sadder than Ozzie. Ozzie is the SADDEST, you assholes!
- Silvy and Waddle are a heck of a good interviewing team. Look at this brilliant series of questions they asked Rich Harden.
Silvy: Do you know what you’re getting into?
Waddle: What are your emotions?
Silvy: When did you know you were going to be traded?
Waddle: How is your shoulder?
Silvy: Are you trying to prove your health to yourself?
Silvy: How is your shoulder?
Waddle: Have you had any welcoming phone calls from new teammates?
Silvy: What do you know about Piniella?
Waddle: Are you aware of the Cubs 100 year World Series drought?Not a single statistical question. Not a single non-fluff meatball. Great interview, you shitheads.
- Maybe the Astros should stop farting in each others’ mouths.
- If you have a hankering to judge Jim Hendry’s moves as the Cub GM, here is a good starting point.
- Hockey at Wrigley? Will wonders never cease?
- I’m glad the Brewers got Sabathia. An organization that classy deserves a good player.
- Screw maple. This is my kind of bat.
Well, that’s it for the Roundup and for me. Enjoy the weekend and enjoy the EXTRAORDINARILY IMPORTANT All-Star Game.
-Sweet Uncle Lou
