Mailbag of Old Tricks

As a Memorial Day Weekend gift to you, Carrie and her band of buffoons are back for another Mailbag. Yay?

I don’t understand the move to send Pie down and sign Edmonds. I like that Edmonds is a power hitter, and a good fielding outfielder, but his numbers in San Diego were awful. Why make this move?
– Jeremiah W., Valparaiso, Ind.

Edmonds is a “power hitter” like Valparaiso is a “hotbed of tourism.”

CARRIE: The move was made to give Pie more time to develop. The Cubs are trying to get him to stride into his swing so he can use his lower body more. If he did that, he would be better positioned to see pitches up and in, and low and away, which he can’t do now. Lou Piniella gave the beat writers a demonstration of what he wants last week in the dugout in Houston, and explained how it’s tough to ask Pie to make the adjustments while in the big leagues. As for Edmonds, he was an inexpensive addition — didn’t cost the Cubs any players — he’s experienced, and if he doesn’t hit, he’ll sit. Piniella is looking for a hot bat.

I thought Pie’s problem when he was up earlier this year was that he used his lower body too much, IF YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN. AM I RIGHT, CARRIE? AM I RIGHT?

I noticed that Kerry Wood has appeared on three different Cubs playoff teams. Has anyone else appeared on three? Also, has anyone appeared on four? If not, hopefully Wood can be the first.
– Mark W., Ravenswood, Ill.

Isn’t the “look it up yourself” question generally the penultimate one in these Mailbags?

CARRIE: Cubs baseball historian Ed Hartig did the research, and said that 13 players have played in four series, including 10 from 1906-1910. That group includes Mordecai Brown, Frank Chance, Johnny Kling, Orval Overall, Jack Pfiester, Ed Reulbach, Frank Schulte, Jimmy Sheckard, Harry Steinfeldt, and Joe Tinker. More recently, Stan Hack, Gabby Hartnett and Charlie Root also played in four series.

Poor Ed Hartig. He does all the heavy lifting for these answers and gets rewarded by having to spend more time talking to Carrie Muskat.

I read an article about Sean Gallagher using the same diet that Wood used. It also mentioned Geovany Soto as well as other Cubs losing weight because of the plan. Do you know what the diet consisted of?
– Paul P., Shreveport, La.

TRANSLATION: I weigh 350 pounds, which sucks because it’s really hard to find a jersey that fits.

CARRIE: Gallagher, Soto and Wood all subscribed to the Sunfare, a company that provides fresh personalized meals, but currently is only available to clients in the Los Angeles and Phoenix areas. Gallagher has been in contact with a company in Chicago to keep him on track and away from the Twinkies.

TRANSLATION: Buy lots of sweatpants and Zubaz.

Could Carlos Zambrano participate in the Home Run Derby if he goes to the All-Star Game?
– Brenda W., San Francisco

Yep. And you could be a Jeopardy contestant.

CARRIE: He could, but the Cubs would prefer that he doesn’t.

Is it shaky way out there on that limb, Carrie?

Recently it was brought up that the Cubs bullpen has gone quite a few innings without giving up any runs in consecutive games. What team has the longest stretch where the bullpen did not allow any runs over consecutive games?
– Ryan E., Charleston, Ill.

I hate to break this to you, Hartig…

CARRIE: Since 1956, the longest stretch is eight games, done four times: April 20-28, 1963; June 12-23, 1963; July 25-Aug. 1, 1998; and May 25-June 2, 2000. Thanks again to Hartig for looking it up. The relievers also have held opponents scoreless in 14 of 23 May games.

Can Hartig have his own Mailbag? Or half your paycheck?

Could you tell me how many games the Cubs have won when they score the first run in the game? My father and I were talking about it the other day and I’ve been curious ever since.
– Andrew W., Bunker Hill, Ind.

Confirming my suspicion that every day is an action-packed day in Bunker Hill, Indiana.

CARRIE: The Cubs are 21-8 when scoring first heading into Monday’s Memorial Day contest. They also have 12 come from behind wins, and have won five games in the last at-bat.

Hartig’s answer must have been, “Do your own goddamn work!”

My favorite Maddux memory is a Saturday afternoon at Wrigley in ‘92 or ‘93. The Cubs scored one in the first. They put a runner in scoring position in every inning except the eighth, as I recall, but never scored again. The one run was enough for Maddux to win. Wish I could remember the team they were playing.
– Scott C., Albuquerque, N.M.

And I wish the Mailbag wasn’t a public forum for you to remember shit that happened sixteen years ago.

CARRIE: It might have been Aug. 16, 1992, which was a Sunday. The Cubs faced the Houston Astros at Wrigley Field, and scored in the first when Ryne Sandberg walked with one out, advanced on Mark Grace’s single, and scored one batter later on a fielder’s choice by Derrick May. Maddux gave up four hits for the complete-game win, and it was one of four shutouts he had that season. The Cubs did have at least one runner on base every inning but the eighth, and stranded 12 in the game. Maddux improved to 15-9 with the win, and the game was played in a snappy 2 hours, 18 minutes. Were you there? There were 33,455 at Wrigley that day.

Incidentally, Scott, your question was the one that put Hartig into rehab.

The National League Rookie of the Year looks to be a fight between Joey Votto of the Cincinnati Reds and Soto. Do you think they could be the two fighting for the award come the end of September?
– Kevin D., Fort Wayne, Ind.

Nope. I think Dusty will demand the Reds trade for a “proven veteran” like Richie Sexson and Votto will get ten starts in the second half.

CARRIE: What about Fukudome? He’s considered a rookie, even though he had played nine seasons in Japan, and also in contention. Soto certainly got off to a good start when he won NL Rookie of the Month honors in April, and because he plays such a tough position, he will be a leading candidate.

What about him? He’s fantastic, but Soto has been better. Far better.

I’m intrigued by the pink backpack. Are any records kept on how many times each pitcher has carried it? Do we know who has the best record when carrying the backpack on a given day? I doubt people keep track of this.
– Eric H., Pekin, Ill.

Somewhere, Ed Hartig puts a hollow-tipped bullet into a revolver, takes a large swig of whiskey, and cries.

CARRIE: The Cubs relievers admit they are not charting who has the best record. However, Jon Lieber did point out he was 2-0 in the two times he carried the backpack to the bullpen.

The Cubs relievers have also admitted they don’t chart how many times Eyre clogs the clubhouse toilet, how many times Quade is mistaken for Kevin Bacon’s character in Hollow Man, and the combined weight of DeRosa’s chicks.

After watching Jon Lester’s no-hitter, I was wondering when the last time a Cub threw a no-no. How many have they thrown in franchise history?
– Kenny H., Boise, Idaho

We tried asking Hartig, but for some reason he’s not answering his phone.

CARRIE: Milt Pappas threw the last Cubs no-no on Sept. 2, 1972, beating San Diego, 8-0. Pappas missed a perfect game when he walked Larry Stahl on a 3-2 pitch with two outs in the ninth. It was one of 14 no-hitters by a Cubs pitcher, including Don Cardwell’s on May 15, 1960, when he was making his Cubs debut. Ken Holtzman threw two no-no’s — Aug. 19, 1969, vs. Atlanta, and June 3, 1971, at Cincinnati. Larry Corcoran had three for the Cubs in the early 1880s.

Why are people so lazy? It took me three seconds to do this. The very first link led me to this. From there, I clicked this. I guarantee the whole goddamn process took less time than it did to type that e-mail. I used to have a rule back when I was an R.A. in college. It was, “Don’t be stupid.” Learn this rule.

Do the Cubs plan on bringing up Jeff Samardzija any time soon? I also heard he can throw left-handed and right-handed. Is that true? If so, do they plan on using him as his own reliever?
– Dakota L., Clarksville, Tenn.

Who in the hell has been feeding you your information? You honestly think he’s ambidextrous? I know it’s happened before, but if Samardzija could do it, you’d hear about it. Also, he’s pitching terribly, so he isn’t coming up any time soon.

CARRIE: Samardzija isn’t quite ready for prime time. He’s 3-4 with a 6.14 ERA in 10 starts through Friday. Cubs general manager Jim Hendry has been keeping tabs on the right-hander, and said part of the problem may be that Samardzija is trying too hard. “I think he’s trying to do so well, he may be overdoing it,” Hendry said. “Some of it is the ongoing process of becoming a full-time professional baseball player.” Samardzija knows he has work to do. Check out his blog on his website. On May 12, he wrote that he was “pretty ticked over my last outing,” which was a loss to Huntsville in which he gave up seven runs on six hits and four walks over 2 2/3 innings. He wrote that he did everything he didn’t want to do from a pitching standpoint. And, he notes some fans don’t like his short hair. On Saturday, he pitched in relief. That’s not a permanent move, but it did work last year.

I took Carrie’s advice and checked out Samardzija’s website. Words. Cannot. Describe. Just go. You’re missing out on an important part of the experience if you don’t have sound.

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