Kermit tells me you chumps are getting snow today? Bwaahaahaa! Whaddya mean, “We have a game there in ten days”? So, listen, on the request of Level5, Kermit added a couple of new shirts to the old HJE shop, including The Hundley, The Perez, and The Essian (pictured, duh). There’s still time to get yours before Opening Day. Anyhow, happy crucifixion of your Lord Day, Catholics. Here’s your Roundup:
- Look, Rich Hill has been bad this spring, and he was terrible yesterday. There is talk that he might be out of the rotation. Until he starts doing a stupid Harry Caray impression, though, and putting Icy Hot in everyone’s jocks, he still has an edge over Dempster.
- If you ever get the urge to bitch about our lineup, just look over at Baltimore, where resident dickhead Kevin Millar was just named the Orioles’ cleanup hitter for 2008. Yeesh.
- Turns out that Kerry Wood back spasm non-story was just that. A non-story.
- Are the Tigers interested in Michael Wuertz? More importantly, do we have any interest whatsoever in Brandon Inge or Marcus Thames? God, I hope not.
- Kermit’s fantasy team players always manage to hurt themselves prior to the season. Apparently, that trend carries over to his Neifiball team. Of course, on the other hand…
- Holy shit, Reds fans. Maybe you can ask Dolan if you can borrow his “Dude, When Does My Contract Expire?” graphic for Dusty.
- Five Outs to Go is running their own tournament, the “Tournament of Cubdom.” The tournament pits typical Cub fan moments (some good, some horrendous) against one another.
- You know it’s almost the end of Spring Training when the beat writers are covering what the guys are writing on their shoes.
- Maybe Michael should have tried this on Lost last night.
Well, that’s it for me, kids. Only two more weekends left until we have baseball that anyone cares about.
-Sweet Uncle Lou
