Don’t tell Matt Clement he made The Bottom 126. He’s likely to cry. Or is that how he always looks?
Let’s get something straight right off the bat. Clement wasn’t bad as a Cub. In fact, he strung together his three best seasons while in a Cub uniform.
So why The Bottom 126? Clement picked up the win, after all, in the Cubs’ division-clinching game in 2003. He seems like a nice enough Amish guy, right?
Three reasons:
- He, along with Antonio Alfonseca, cost the Cubs Dontrelle Willis right before the start of the 2002 season.
- He was putrid during the second half of the 2004 season (which, after the acquisition of Maddux, was supposed to be the Cubs’ season), right around the time the Cubs decided to take a dive.
- He wasn’t man enough to take the ball in Game 6. You know which Game 6 I’m talking about.
If there is one Cub pitcher who stands head and shoulders above all others in causing me bloody hangnails in the past few decades, that pitcher is Matt Clement. Did you ever once feel good when Clement took the mound? No matter his numbers, Clement somehow managed to make me queasy every fifth day. Perhaps it was because Clement himself constantly looked like the new guy in the homicide division who vomits into the grass at his first crime scene.
Mound presence and Matt Clement have never even heard of one another.
A far worse crime on The Bottom 126, however, is having anything to do with the Cubs’ 2003 demise. Allegedly, Clement, who had pitched well in Game 4 of the series, declared himself unavailable for bullpen duty in Game 6. Matt, in Games 6 and 7 of the NLCS, there is no tomorrow. Did Randy Johnson puss out of the 2001 World Series? No. He dragged his lanky ass and mullet out of that bullpen and helped finish off the Yankees.
How badass you would have been, Matt, if you had trotted down to the bullpen in the 7th inning of Game 6? In that horrible 8th inning, I certainly would have rather seen you come in and try to stop the bleeding than Kyle Farnsworth, Mike Remlinger, and Antonio Alfonseca. But you were “unavailable,” which to me says you were praying to your Amish god that you wouldn’t be called upon again to help the Cubs get to the World Series. Damnit, Matt. I even had “Wild Thing” cued up for you on my CD player.
Of course, 2003 never happened, 2004 was far, far worse, and after 2004 Clement left the Cubs to join the Red Sawx, bumping him up another few slots on The Bottom 126. Thanks for the one memory, Matt. If only you’d had the guts to give us one more.
Low Point: May 28, 2004. Clement drills Bobby Hill, Jason Kendall, and Craig Wilson in one inning during a game against the Pirates, tying a Major League record. The Cubs were leading 1-0 before the inning, and left it down 4-1. They lost the game 9-5. “Excuse me, Mr. Clement, can I have your autograph? I saw your record on the news. You made their Hall of Shame. Congratulations.”
Did You Know? Clement was the pitcher during what may be the longest at bat in Major League history. On May 12, 2004, against the Los Angeles Dodgers, Clement had to throw 18 pitches during a single at-bat to Alex Cora in the bottom of the 7th inning. Cora fouled 14 straight pitches off Clement before finally hitting a home run. How very typical.
It got worse for us when I got hit with a line drive with the Red Sox. It hurted.
We all knew that homer was coming.
Best part of that Cora story? The epilogue. The following day, Zambrano is on the mound against the Dodgers. Cora comes up, fouls off two or three pitches, and Z drills him.
Love that man.
You missed a reason, his asthma making it take him 5 hours to pitch 7 innings.
However, I really can’t hate Clement, he was good and didn’t fall to pieces (as a cub).
I don’t hate Matt Clement, but I hate his silly little beard.
i actually have the facial hair that I do because of Clement.
Clement also laid an egg for Boston in Game 1 of the ’05 ALDS against the White Sox, making sure they got off on the right foot, and further infuriating most Cub fans.
ahh yes..good ol matty…i remember quite well being a game against the expos where he had to come out and they put in..gulp..glendon rusch
so do you think lou needs another lefty in the bullpen?…I’m more then ready.. I have a feeling that I will be making an apperance on this list before all is said and done
Is it weird that I black out for a moment when announcers talk about Elder Matthias’ “electric stuff”? Yeah, there’s no question his shit moves all over the place, but if everybody alive can pick it up, does it matter?
Yeah, his stuff moves all over the place. Most of those places include the following: the bricks behind the catcher, 6 feet in front of home plate, and three feet to the left of the outside corner of the plate.
Clement probably wanted the ball in game 7 which was the game Dusty “Douchbag” Baker put in Veres and Farnsworthless in the 5th inning. Dusty did not put him in the game. He never refused to pitch. He never had run support in hardly any games in 2004. He does not deserve to be on this list. It also wasn’t his fault he got traded.
The Cubs didn’t need him in Game 7 like they needed him in Game 6, when he allegedly told Dusty that he “couldn’t go.”
Aw, your so mean to Ole Weezy, I loved him and his throwback Amish beard….even if he kinda sucked sometimes. Its just he never had the stamina for an entire season – his asthmatic self is only good for about three months, then he craps out. If they would just start him in June or July, everything be’d alright. I’m surprised he’s this low though, if you completely block out the 2003 postseason like I have (ah, denial is such a warm, happy place) then I don’t think he’s in the same company as some of the other ‘worst cubs in history’.
Don’t worry. He’s not one of the worst in history. Just one of the worst of my time. Keep in mind, that “worst” doesn’t necessarily mean talent alone…
I guess nothing ever in history has been Clement’s fault seeing as how he willingly signed as a free agent with Boston. That means he was traded. Pause. NOT.
I think Ricky probably meant the Dontrelle Willis trade.