Ah, the magical summer of 2005. Corey Patterson and Jason Dubois were sucking the life out of the Cubs outfield. The Cubs were sucking the life out of Cubs fans everywhere. I was sucking back a beer, when I heard the news that the Cubs had sent Patterson and Dubois down to AAA Iowa, and had called up two kids from the West Tennessee Diamond Jaxx: Matt “Red” Murton and Adam Greenberg.

Murton made his major league debut on July 8, 2005, in a win over the Florida Marlins. Greenberg had to wait until the next night to get his chance against those same Marlins. Valerio de los Santos was on the mound in the 9th inning, trying to hold the Cubs at their 4-2 lead. Todd Hollandsworth grounded out to start the inning, and the left-handed hitting Greenberg came in to hit for Will Ohman.

I vividly remember how excited and confident Greenberg looked, striding to the plate and then going through his pre-pitch ritual. His helmet was shiny; his uniform spotless. De los Santos wound up, delivered, and “CRACK!” earholed Greenberg on the first pitch he saw in the Major Leagues.

It was for the best, Adam.
Don’t wink, kid.

And thus ended Greenberg’s career as a Cub, cementing one of the better statistical lines on Baseball-Reference. One game. Zero at-bats. 1.000 OBP. Here’s to you, Moonlight.

Low point: Somewhere between the time De los Santos released the ball and the time it connected with the side of Greenberg’s head.

Did you know? Greenberg is still trying to work his way up to the bigs, having signed a minor league contract with the Kansas City Royals on December 5, 2006. And he thought it couldn’t get any worse than his only Major League at-bat.