Hire Jim Essian |

A A

Skip’s Comment of the Week: February 5, 2010

Posted by Skip on Friday, February 5, 2010

Howdy, gang! We had an awful lot of comments from which to choose this week, but one stood out above the rest, and it’s from our old pal A-Ram Baller in the “Paul Sullivan burned my Bible” post. A-Ram does what we should all do every once in a while. Poke a little fun [...]

Sweet Uncle Lou’s Friday Roundup: The “Peace, Love, Dopes” Edition

Posted by Sweet Uncle Lou on Friday, February 5, 2010

3 Comments

Sigh. I leave you guys for one week, and all hell breaks loose around here. Can’t you nerds just realize that you’re all nerds and embrace one another at the next Star Trek convention? Or do MORE than hug? Look, for a bunch of people who root for a team that [...]

Paul Sullivan Gave My Imaginary Kid Boner Cancer

Posted by Bad Kermit on Wednesday, February 3, 2010

56 Comments

For some reason, our good friend PAUL SULLIVAN has been taking an awful beating lately from some blogs you probably don’t read. I don’t like it. I don’t care if you think it’s because I’ve shared a beer with Paul. I don’t care if you think you can beat up me and [...]

They’re Coming to Take the Muskbox Away. Ho Ho. Hee Hee. Ha Ha.

Posted by Bad Kermit on Tuesday, February 2, 2010

15 Comments

It has finally happened. After reading the dumbest of the dumb questions submitted by Cubs fans to the Muskbox, her brain has finally snapped in twain. And now, they’re coming to take her away to the funny farm where life is beautiful all the time, and she’ll be happy to see those nice [...]

Throw Up

Posted by Bad Kermit on Monday, February 1, 2010

10 Comments

Oh, Jim Hendry. Just when you had me excited about the Xavier Nady signing and the Chad Tracy signing, you do something silly, like sign Kevin Millar. There is likely no way this move will affect the Major League club. Millar sucks and likely can’t outplay, well- anyone. If he makes [...]

Sosa Urges Banks to Come Clean

Posted by Bad Kermit on Thu, Jan 28, 2010

15 Comments

Earlier this week, Ernie Banks urged Sammy Sosa to come clean about his use of performance-enhancing drugs. Rather than take the advice of the Cub Hall of Famer, Sosa instead urged Banks to reveal that he is moonlighting as annoying, self-appointed Cub mascot, Ronnie “Woo Woo” Wickers.

And the Fourth Outfielder Is…Kosuke Fukudome?

Posted by Bad Kermit on Wed, Jan 27, 2010

15 Comments

And the Fourth Outfielder Is…Kosuke Fukudome?

Get ready for a bunch of amazingly stupid “X” jokes. If Xavier Nady can successfully turn his head and cough while Mark O’Neal is cupping his balls, he’s going to be a Cub. Yes, that article contains the first of your stupid “X” jokes.

The Muskbox Flirts with Relevance; Gets Rejected

Posted by Bad Kermit on Tue, Jan 26, 2010

10 Comments

The Muskbox Flirts with Relevance; Gets Rejected

This week’s Muskbox accomplishes a nearly impossible feat. It’s unprecedented. An entire Muskbox passes without a single relevant question about an actual starting player on the Major League baseball club. How is that possible? Only the Muskbox knows for sure.

Google Mining the Cubs

Posted by Bad Kermit on Mon, Jan 25, 2010

4 Comments

As you know, I love being right at the absolute forefront of all your base are belong to us internet memes, so when I saw that Google mining became popular about six months ago, I jumped right on that trend! Some of the things you can learn about people from their Google habits should [...]

Skip’s Comment of the Week: January 22, 2010

Posted by Skip on Fri, Jan 22, 2010

1 Comment

Skip’s Comment of the Week: January 22, 2010

Hey, there, gang! Skip has been falling behind in his comment selection, so this week, you get two comments for the price of one. How exciting is that? Our first comment was turned in by our old pal, Mark Giangreco Roman Wrestler: If Mike Quade reads this blog, he is so gonna paint slanted eyebrows [...]